Mislead and Unknown

everything you never cared to know
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2002-01-19 19:21:51 (UTC)

This Hell of Mine

they dont get it,
my life isnt real,
i'll try my best to explain,
dont get lost in the way i feel.

i'm blinded by pain,
numb from it all,
i'm way too young,
for such a great fall.

you try to explain,
just the way i feel,
put me into categories,
my everything that makes me real.

i'm so lost and confused,
spinning out of control,
of pain, loss, and what life is,
i'm only losing my all.

when you ask whats wrong,
i dont know what to say,
i want to lst it all go,
do anything to get away.

how great do you feel,
after breaking up with your love,
but what if there was no good-bye,
and only thoughts of them above.

What if they never had any last words,
you wake up and they're gone,
and no dreams of comfort,
are for you from that one.

some may see,
and others just pretend,
that they know how i feel,
but no one seems to understand.

so until the day,
you really know how i feel,
and you really understand,
dont try to tell me how to deal.

now dont get me wrong,
i know what you mean to do,
but what i need is impossable,
its beyond the power of you.

i dont know how to escape the pain,
my life is so empty and unreal,
please dont get mad or frustrated,
i'm just telling you how i feel.

i know i cant change anything,
and that i've lost all control,
but what is going to die next?
when is it all gonna go?

i'm sick of putting up a front,
a made up smile on my face,
but if i ever let my guard down,
i'd only be a discrace.

what i hate the most,
more than anything in the world,
is watching other people hurt,
with a voice that cant be heard.

why do i fel so helpless,
so empty and alone,
a life so short and painful,
this hell's my only home.

i'm missing so mcuh,
oh God please help me,
i'm sorry, forgive me,
make it stop hurting to be.

i cry every night,
until i fall asleep,
its the only way i can deal with pain,
i think i'm in too deep.

all i ever want is to be happy,
to forget and start again,
but no, not gonna happen,
i fight but i just cant win.

sorry to have given up,
just going through the motions,
nothing left to light up my life,
i just ran out of devotion.

please do not feel bad for me,
it only worries me so,
just try to understand,
i'm standing still while everything goes.

i know i'm blind,
i know i'm selfish and sad,
i hope no one has to walk in my shoes,
to deal with the shit that i have.

so this is it,
my story ends here,
i hope you listened to me,
made things a little more clear.

we are all different,
all in the same way,
tell everyone you love them,
before they go away.


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