jasmine

Conversations with myself (live from the pinkroom
2018-08-15 17:48:52 (UTC)

That's why

We've been messaging each other ever since I visited his home. Every day we talk but its usually surface area stuff but I'm cool with that. And now we have pet names for each other. And yeah sure we're still "friends" but now we're supposed to go on a date which he claims will be the best date I've been on. I'm not sure how true that will be but I do know he'll be one of the sweetest guys I've ever been on a date with. Again I'm not sure what we are. He hasn't actually said "I like you" but we're set to go on a date so I guess I have to read in between the lines. The thing is that he said he won't try to kiss me so I'm like what's the point of calling it date? And why won't you try to kiss me? Mixed signals here ....Also, I actually want to kiss him....

Anyway, my problem right now is that I expect us to talk every day and I'm not sure how healthy that is for me. We haven't defined what we are, albeit, there is no need to. But somehow he's become the person I want to talk every day, all day. And I know he gets off at 4pm and that's when I get to talk to him. When he's off from work and I don't hear from him much I wonder who he's with and what he's doing like he's mine and HE'S NOT. I'm getting possessive a bit and I hate how that is having me act. That's why I don't like labels and feeling too much for others. I either have to be emotionally distant or an obsessive psychopath, usually there is no in between. I find it difficult to find a middle ground. So now I have to figure out how to navigate this situation before I mess around and get hurt.

xoxo much love




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