🌅Katie-Brave🌌

✉My Letter To The World✉
2018-04-18 16:39:38 (UTC)

Crumbling

Mood: Dark
Song: Demons by Imagine Dragons
Color: Purple

The messages that are beings sent to me today.

You are an untrust worthy person.
You are worthless.
You are a liar.
You are diffictult to live with
You are difficult to talk to.
Your can't know anything about whats going on.
You Over react.
Your confrontational.
I can't talk to you.
It would be easier if you were't here.
You don't know what your actually like.
You need to stop.
I'm sorry i even tried talking to you.
You are out of place here.
Your opinions don't matter.
I don't want to hear anything you have to say.
Are you mad? get over it.
Are you hurt? let it go.


Like.....look i know my own negative traits....i know i'm not easy to live with, but neither are you!
.......do you know what it's like to be kicked when your down by someone who you thought you could trust and they could trust you? do you understand how offensive your implying that i wasn't trustworth was? how much that hurt?
Like all i have ever done my entire life is keep your secrets, to hold in all the things that were going on when the world felt like it was ending and we walk in with smile and act like everythings alright when it wasn't.
and no one knew because we aren't talking about it.

That's whats happening now, i can talk about this because it's what hurt me, but i can't talk about the subject we were discussing when you hurt me becasue i have to continue to hold your secrets.
I'm going to let this go, i'm going to smile and pretend everythings fine when it's not just like always.
I'm tired.

and it's not even the secrets....i'm used to that. i can deal with it, you learn to hide things well when you live in a glass house.
But what i can't handle is being attacked from the inside, being cut down and pushed around and insulted and condeseded to when i've done nothing to deserve that, i've never given you a reason not to trust me....not with you secrets, not with our family's issues and stuff....never not even as a child who wouldn't understand the gravity of importance that keeping the secrets was.

Headache, feel like crying.
I'm tired and thank God i'm alone.
This day started fine....and went down hill in what a 10 minute time period....one conversation can change everything.
Can make a firm foundation you thought you were standing on feel like a crumbling cliff.

Peace.




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