2018-02-01 17:19:12 (UTC)

Why was I born ?

Earphones plugged in my ears with the maximum volume. I raced the accelarator like a racer trying to leave everything behind, but still the crowd and public restricted me to go ahead.
I have never spoked much about my father, but today I am all broken and disturbed. Sometimes I feel what if I was an Orphan. The years I have passed, it was better if I didn't had a father. Never have I felt love for him nor did he ever cared about me. Sometimes, I have a doubt if do I exist or not ?? Now is the time when I feel to move out of my house and start living on my own. The last time I did it 5 years ago, it was a different scenario and it was a silly reason but now I have a fucking reason to do it. Maybe one day I will be go so far thar no one could even get my ashes to float in the water.
Its not easy to live for 19 years like a nobody where no one knows your likes, dislikes. I have been living it like that since my born. All my aspirations and aims are still dreams. Dreams those which had always been in my mind which nobody knows.
People have left me alone many times. The people whom I had loved the most left me or have betrayed me. Friends, family and even my love have left me alone in this mystic world. So it will not be a problem if again someone leaves me. I have felt embrassed everytime for my father and now the time has come that I don't even want him.
I don't cry. My tears have became invisible,it has frozen, but one day it will burst like those black clouds in the sky and that day no one could stop my tears