Brandon

Brandon
2018-01-13 19:39:51 (UTC)

Hypocrisy

I always find it interesting how people reveal their true colors when they are no longer a part of your every day life. When you're with them they hold certain values, morals, and expectations, but once they no longer have that sway or "control" over you, they do a complete 180 and turn against those very values they said YOU didn't have. I'm not one for calling people out on what they do. However, when it comes to hurting my friends, the people in my life that I care about very much, that's where I draw the line. A very close friend of mine is going through issues with their significant other. I won't go into the details because their private life is their business. What I'm more angry and concerned about is the way Patrick is handling it. I don't care about using the name because that privacy walked out the door when he did. More importantly however, is that he seems to be giving advice that is completely contradictory to the values and morals he held me to in our relationship. Most of us would agree that when you are dating someone and are very serious about them, them going to see an ex lover/spouse alone would be out of the question. I certainly know that in my past relationship I would never have been "allowed" to see any of my exes even if I wanted to.


In my relationship with Patrick I was not allowed to like certain posts, post certain things, talk to certain people etc. I basically lived in a nutshell. He would have liked for me to get rid of all my social media in general, which I was almost willing to do. Looking back, I'm glad I didn't because it was a huge sign of insecurity and overall lack of trust. I was no saint but that's not something I need to rehash in every entry. I made mistakes, owned them, fixed them to the best of my ability and have moved on. However, in this most recent issue between my friends, Patrick decided that he had a right to tell one of them how they should be acting and to basically "cave in" to the other one going to see their ex. I don't understand how someone can give the OPPOSITE advice of what they would want their significant other to be doing to people who he considers his friends, while not even having the mental capacity to fight for his own relationship. I don't understand how he thinks he has a right to give any input when he can't even fight for his own partner. Like I've said before, each day I seem to learn something new about myself or the people around me and situations like this just make me grateful and happy that I was able to get out of that relationship when I did. He still apparently has a lot of work to do.

Writing is my way of expressing things I can't normally express. I cannot just confront the people involved about this situation because unlike Patrick, I know it isn't my place. However, there's a lot more people who are going to get involved than is realized. When one of my friends gets hurt I make sure to protect them and will take whatever steps necessary to do so. I'm not the only one who sees the hypocrisy in all of this either. My roommate and best friend was completely appalled by the whole thing. It goes against everything Patrick would preach on a daily basis and supports the very things he would shame me about. Not only is he giving advice against his supposed conscious, but he is also hurting someone that I thought he had considered a friend. I'm starting to realize more and more that maybe I wasn't the toxic one in this relationship that I was made out to be. It's becoming more and more clear through his words and actions that he truly wasn't this genuine, loving, and caring man I thought he was. It definitely makes it easier for me to continue being happy, knowing I dodged a bullet. Anyone who is able to hurt their friends and be two-faced like that truly doesn't deserve what I have to offer. It's a sad and harsh truth, but if someone can so easily cut you out of their life and act as if you never existed then to hell with them. I have so many people day in and day out talking to me, seeing me, and wanting to be around me. I've been surrounded by love and positive vibes since the new year started and I look forward to it every day.




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