Nightowl

Night by Night
2018-01-06 21:28:31 (UTC)

Insecurities

So I know everyone has their own insecurities.. right? The normal are like, looks, future, blah blah blah.. My biggest insecurity is that ill never be good enough for anyone. Not just the typical 'ill never find a future significant other' but the fact that I constantly feel like every single person that has entered or exited my life will always at some point realize that i'm not good enough or that they could do better. I am constantly in fear that one day everyone will realize that they can do better and leave me. I fear that one day I will have no one to turn to when my mind decides that it wants to take over again. I'm constantly afraid that people are one day just not going to want me around anymore. And the worst part? It's already starting to happen. It's not people coming up to me and telling me they don't want me around anymore. It's people that I have told EVERYTHING to and they just......... forgot about me. My biggest insecurity turned into my biggest fear. And that is starting to happen. And the scariest part... Is that I saw it coming from a million miles away...... yet I did nothing to try to make it not happen. Is it my fault it's starting to happen? Could I have done something different to make people want to stay? Is there a way to change myself fast enough that more people won't want to leave me anymore? All in all.... Is there anything I can do?




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