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2018-01-03 13:02:21 (UTC)

Just like a waterfall in Black and White.

I question the point of existing sometimes. I feel like everything is a waste of time. I feel like the day to day activities of surviving are literally pointless. I'm grateful that I have you, and that we're surviving together. But it's the day to day musts that I'm losing faith in.

I want to achieve something, I want to enjoy something. I want to wake up knowing that I'll experience something beneficial. Unfortunately, these days I don't seem to experience anything worthwhile outside of you. Everything else in my life seems pointless, like a distant memory that I'm trying to hold onto.

Once again, I feel lost and broken. I feel like I'm lost at sea moving no where.

Even once I find land, I'll be stranded with you in a place I don't want to be. At least you'll be by my side which makes everything worthwhile. I just wish I had ambitions and an actual goal, something to work towards.

You are my everything, you are where I want to be.

I can't believe that I have tried so hard to die, I can't believe that I have to live without you.