Kill Switch

The Chaos Code
2017-08-30 23:21:23 (UTC)

Geriatric Psych Ward

WELP. IT HAPPENED. IT FINALLY HAPPENED. My dad just got thrown in a geriatric psych ward (basically, a ward for old people).

I've been in a hotel since yesterday and I'm staying tonight, as well, so I'm far away from the drama but I go back tomorrow and ugggghhhhh. BUT ANYWAYS, so they found out it is not a brain tumor, but actually hypothyroidism. Which, my mom has that, too. But his case is super extreme and it could very well be causing all this stuff going on.

But holy fuck, bruh, my mom is a badass! Like. . .my mom forced him to go to the VA today and they said it would take a minimum of 90 days for him to be seen and my mom was like "No, that's not going to work. We need to go to the ER." My dad said no...and they went home. He was adamant.

BUT LATER TODAY, my mom caught him unplugging the router and trying to hide it in the ceiling tiles in the basement. She yelled at him and told him to put it down and hook it back up NOW. She was quite stern. But then my dad grabbed her, pushed her up against a wall, and basically growled at her that he wasn't going to take any of her shit anymore. To which, my mom shrugged and was like "WELP, you just crossed a line. Now I can call 911. Because no I fear you. So make up your mind. Do you want ,me to call 911 or do you want to go to the ER with me?" My mom is such a badass, so my dad knew not to test her and agreed to go to the ER with her.

SO they go to the ER and he thinks he's just getting scanned for a tumor and blood work drawn to figure out why he's bleeding from his ears. Little did he know, my mom typed up a full page of what was going on and gave it to the doctors so that they could put it in his permanent file and reference it when need be. Which. . .he was being totally uncooperative because he never cooperates with anyone. And he hasn't left the house in well over 20 years. He hasn't been around anyone but my mom and me for over 20 years. So Idk what that's even about but he hates being around people for some reason and he won't leave the house. He never did even when I was little. But, recently, it's become extreme. Where he won't even go get the mail at the bottom of the mountain. Idk what that is all about. . .BUT I DO KNOW that he is not going to do anything he is supposed to do, which means he's probably going to be transferred to a state geriatric ward far away from here because the geriatric ward he's in now is only a short-term facility. But that means that he will probably never get out for the rest of his life.

From all the times I have been in wards, I have been threatened to be put in a state ward by therapists over and over and over again, but it never has happened so I think that was a scare tactic. But it very well could ring true for my dad.

But, anyways, they ask him all these questions after he finds out they are involuntarily committing him (he could have been voluntary, but he refused lmao) and he legit will not answer any of them, called my mom a bitch, and wouldn't look her in the eyes or even look at her. And he is blaming her. Completely. He was being so bitter and poutty and sarcastic. Lmao. Hilarious. My dad in his poutty mode makes me fucking laugh because it is so funny with how pathetic and embarrassing he is. Pfffft. AND THEN HE WAS SO POUTTY AND ANGRY AT MY MOM THAT WHEN THEY ASKED HIM ABOUT DNR ON HIS WILL, HE LEGIT WAS LIKE "Yes." So he is now a do not resuscitate if anything happens. Hahaha....jeeze.

But luckily, my being all these wards all my life prepared my mom for the worst of it. The anger, the blaming, the cursing, the hatred. . .she knew it was coming because every single time I have been in a psych ward in an area around where she is, I become so brutal. Of course, when I get out, I feel awful and sorry coz of what a dick I had been being to her during the time I was in there. So she actually thanked me for that on the phone and we both laughed.

But my dad? He is DEFINITELY not going to play the game. If you've ever been in a ward before, then you know what I'm talking about. In wards, you have to lie as much as you possibly can, turn yourself into an entirely different personality from the very beginning, go to all groups and just lie lie lie, go to therapy and lie lie lie about how great you're feeling and how happy you are and make up all these wonderful things happening in your life that are definitely not actually happening, you have to be outside of your room and very social (again, my dad hasn't been around anyone but my mother and me since 20 years ago) all day from wake up time to bed time, you have to eat whatever they give you and eat full portions since your meals are logged,...basically all you have to do is turn yourself off and turn another personality specific to wards on and then you play the game for 5-7 days and then you get out! It's as simple as that. After being in so many, I know the system and drill so well that I am boss mode at getting out of psych wards. I was on a mandatory 72 hour baker act, once, and they let me go a day early because I played the system. Pffft. I know this shit like the back of my hand. My dad? He won't do any of it. I know he won't. I know for a fact that he will not. No matter what. He even said to my mom "I'm going to be in here forever. So don't bother visiting me." Lmao lmao lmaaaoooooo.

He's in a short term facility right now so if he doesn't participate, like...within the next 7 days, they're probably going to transfer him to a state ward. Which. . .honestly, I would be so happy. But my mom...it would absolutely kill her. And I love my mom to death and I want to be there for her. I'm her only son and only child in general. . .so I have to be there for her. It's hard not to be selfish and allow myself to feel happy over this and feel satisfaction from it all. Coz, after all those damn years of him patronizing me and screaming at me and hitting me for being in wards....all those damn years of him laughing at me every time I got taken away and making damn sure to tell me what a failure I was? WELL. HERE'S A TASTE OF YOUR OWN MEDICINE, BITCH. BYYYYYYE.

I'm trying not to let that happiness show, but I'm sure my mom knows how happy I am. I'm sitting in my hotel room listening to celebratory music and singing and I feel so giddy. Whereas, my mom is probably sobbing into her pillow in the dark right now.

ALSO, my mom talked to a realtor today. THEY'RE FINALLY GOING TO SELL THE GODDAMN HOUSE AND MOVE BACK TO FLORIDA. GOOD LORD, I'M FUCKING ECSTATIC. I want out of that hellish trap of a log cabin on the top of a mountain in the middle of no where in a very oppressive southern atmosphere.

But, wow....Bruh. I'm so happy right now. I have to leave the hotel tomorrow, coz I know my mom needs me and I'm gonna definitely be there for her, but I'm not looking forward to it at all. . .

ANYWAYS. I'm out. Peace, fam. Lololol.




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