Bluebell

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2017-06-19 18:04:05 (UTC)

Spending my time writing!

Good afternoon!

I have managed to cook our meal. I thought that it was delicious and simple as most of the time I cook. I just not enjoy being in the kitchen and spending my time washing pans and plates, etc. I guess the problem is not cooking as I said but the cleaning.

As I ate to early I had a mug of coffee and a slice of toasted bread with jam. The cleaner is here. I am still getting used to her way of being but she is a nice woman.

It continues raining what makes the day to look long and tedious. But I am surviving day by day. I just wish I had more energy to do things then I would not have a cleaner. I am so proud I have tidied the office room. I am glad and it looks nice as well.

By the way, I don't know if I told here (I don't remember) but I took my daughter to the doctor. But for now we have decided not have surgery on her ingrown toenail. It is better after the medicine. However, the other nail is bothering as well. So, I will have to return to the podiatrist. Let's see. More money, guess!

My husband is fine though. I hope tomorrow he has better news for me. Let's see as well. I have spoken to him several times. I miss him as much as he misses me. However, we must continue our lives until we can be definitely together again.

This morning I was miserable again. I can now recognize when I am in such mood of depression and the reasons behind it. My life is dull, tedious and boring. I can name it. I lack money, and I also feel so restricted by it. I would like to be doing something else but I don't know I am always tired and my health condition doesn't help as well. But I still think about working more than I work at home. Maybe I can I just need to trust I can but and what about the days I am feeling extremely tired? I don't know. These thoughts hunt me day by day. What I could have done and I didn't. I will have to live with that.

Hey, although I am not so depressed now because half of the day has gone... And I have worked as well in the house I still feel I need to fulfill my time until tonight. My housework keeps me busy but I get fed up of being alone at home. Well, I have my daughter but most of the time she is in her little world. I mean she has her own worries and responsibilities.

I have been to my parents house this morning and afternoon but briefly. So, I talked to some people. I haven't seen my dad for today. But that is fine as well.

Well, I don't have more news or anything more to talk about... lol so until then good energy to us all.

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