Bluebell

The other side of the coin
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2017-04-22 21:54:10 (UTC)

Green leaves

Hi there!

No, I don't have any news to share at the moment... However, I would like to share how I feel...

I am feeling OK. It means that I am not depressed. I was very tired yesterday and feeling really low as well. My mood has been quite funny lately... There are days I am better and there are days I barely feel like starting the day.

This morning we went to my parents' house as we always do on the weekends... It was good to be surrounded by family but I would like to be out of the house for a while. That makes me feel good. Lately, my mother and I are OK. She has been nice to me. Sometimes, I get tired of going to the stores she likes to go but I get over it because she is my only company. My daughter sometimes goes with me but lately she has to study for her tests. So, as I was saying I guess I got used to follow her around. Also, I started thinking that being out of the house is better than staying at home.

The sunny weather made me feel happy somehow... I do like rain but here in Brazil where I live, people don't use rain coats... It looks like something weird. So, I like to walk in the rain with a rain coat. Anyway, this week was a cloudy week with some showers... It was difficult to predict the weather. It was annoying indeed... It reminded me of England where my husband is at the moment.

I have stopped walking in the path... mainly because of the weather. First, it was too warm and now it is full of insects. It is beautiful the garden and it is something positive because it fills my soul with hope... such a nice and bright day gives me hope. Also, the green leaves makes it all better somehow.

My husband is as I said before back in England. He is better from his cold. I am very happy because I feel that we still have a lot to live together as a family. It was really nice the days he spent here with us in Brazil. He was working today... I wish he could get another job. But I am glad he is employed.

I miss working but nowadays everything is an effort for me. I wish I had more energy to do things. I guess it is related to age as well.

We have plans for the future... One year has gone since my husband left Brazil. Soon, it will be another year. Once my daughter finishes school, then we can really decide if he will return to Brazil or if we go to England... because here he lost his job. So, there were no other options for him... he had to return...

I guess I am being really strong because it is not easy to be apart... I am proud of myself and my daughter. She misses him a lot. It was difficult at the airport. But we survived.

It is 6.50 pm... It is dark outside. It was a long day indeed... Well, I really hate to stare at the clock and see the hours pass... I keep hoping for a better future... Maybe it is just a dream but if you believe enough it might come true...

Anyway, I am much better to write down my thoughts...

Good energy to all of us.

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