Screened In Porch

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2017-03-19 04:24:50 (UTC)

It is hard for me to sleep the way I ..

It is hard for me to sleep the way I should. So, I am trying to just stay up and maybe take a short nap tomorrow so I can attempt to go to bed early Friday night. I really need to get back on a reasonable sleeping schedule. I feel wore slap out most of the time. I do not like to drive at all when I have had no rest.

Last night I was on my desktop in the kitchen area of the house with my back to the room. My son was in bed asleep and no one else was here. I was looking for news stories about the fire in Raleigh. I had the sound cut off on my computer because when I am not listening to something and it is on, it sparks like there is a short in it. When I say sparks, not that you see, but sparks that you hear. Anyway, I was alone. Then suddenly I heard someone clear their throat close to me. I figured my son had woke up or my husband had come home. No one was up and no one was in there but me. I did not feel afraid. I instead felt comforted. This has happened before. But never so close by. I kept waiting to feel breath on my neck It was that close. Again, I felt comforted.

I hope this is a sign that he is ok. I hope he understands that I did not mean to hurt him. I behaved very badly because I knew he would not let it go if I did not. I wish I had not behaved that way as soon as I had. I am not that type of person. Well, I was not until then. I guess if I was just a regular jerk, I would not have felt so horrible about it. But it worked. He moved on. And that was it.

There is a medium near here that I can call if I decide to go talk to her. I am curious if there are any spirts lingering nearby and if I am correct about whom they are. When you get my age, there are many dead people. In time I will know of more dead people that I have alive people. I have seen a ghost before. An apprehension. Using spell check for that word. But most of you get it. Yes, I saw a man one time when I woke up. He was standing at the head of my bed beside the nightstand. He was older, short, small build not much hair and he was looking at me. When I jumped up to get out of bed on the other side of it...and turned toward him again, he was gone. I checked all the doors in that house. We had dead bolts locked from the inside. No one could have came in and no one went out. He was not there. I looked for him a long time.

I have written about other experiences in my life. I do believe.

I think who I heard tonight was my guardian angel. And they were letting me know they are still around. I hear them clearing their throat many times. Not sure about that or why. Could be a number of people. My daughters dad for one or my biological dad or foster dad. It sounds like a man. I do not think it is John. If he could do that stuff he would be doing it where his family is. I need to stop thinking about him.

Seriously. Just forgive me. And maybe that is what that was all about.

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