Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2016-11-08 07:56:44 (UTC)

I Will Submit

I had no trouble getting up this morning. I hit snooze out of habit, but 3 minutes in (to the 5 minute snooze) I was up and about. That may not seem like anything monumental, but for me it's a huge deal. One of the major stumbling blocks for me (in dealing with my depression) is doing the "normal" things most people without depression don't give much thought to. Like getting out of bed, showering, dressing. Sometimes the very idea of having to pick out clothes is enough to make me stay in bed all day. So, I celebrate small victories. Like not snoozing a million times and ending up running late (which throws me into a bad mood for most - if not all - of the day).

This mornings SLM went very well. Almost entirely due to the fact that we had a good week last week. Its not nearly as fun sitting around talking about how shitty we did, but celebrating victories is always lovely. We also didn't have to rearrange half the store like last week.

Without officially telling myself so, I've declared SLM days hiking days (weather permitting). Our meetings are always early in the morning (no later than 9am because the store opens at 10 and sales leaders need to be on the floor). So since it can often be so hard to motivate myself out of bed if I don't have a necessity (like work) forcing me up, I've been taking advantage of already being up, dressed, and out of the house. With it getting dark so early these days, It gives me more time to explore. This is a great plan... as long as I'm not scheduled to work that day.

I went back and hiked the second main trail at Ueland Tree Farm. The Lost Creek trail. On the map it definitely wasn't as long as Chico Creek trail, and I'm competitive with myself, so I did most of the off-cropping service roads that fed off the main trail. All told, I ended up doing 9.42 miles. I'm pretty dang proud of myself. I haven't hiked that many miles in one day in probably years. I can't remember when. I've probably only got about 3-4 miles of trail left that I haven't explored, and the topographical map at the trail head doesn't seem to divulge if there's anything really neat worth seeing on those last bits of trail. Time to move on to another area, at least for a bit. I'm thinking of hiking again tomorrow, but it all depends on how sore I'm feeling. Even though I just got out of an Epsom salt/Bentonite clay bath, I'm feeling a little stiff, but thankfully by back is feeling awesome. It as starting to kill those last 3 miles out.

I didn't get to see any awesome panoramic views today. I was socked into forest most of the time, only getting the occasional glimpse of a snow dusted mountaintop, or a hint of Puget Sound off in the distance, obstructed by trees. It didn't matter. I had my head down most of the time, anyway. It's been rainy the past few days (it was overcast, but dry today), and rainy days mean... mushrooms! As crazy as it sounds, I love photographing mushrooms. I find them so unique and intriguing. I also met a new friend. A tiny field mouse darted across my path, and instead of skittering off into the woods, he/she stopped on the edge of the trail and just looked at me. I knelt down and spoke softly to them, and took a picture. It's the cutest thing ever! I still can't believe it happened.

I got home around 4:45pm and Keenan came skipping out of the house in his ballet clothes. I had a mini panic attack, until I figured out what day and time it was. I don't know why, but my mind hadn't registered that today was Monday (I don't know why people hate Monday's so much, but that discussion is for another entry). I really just wanted to eat, take a bath, and sleep, but that had to be postponed, because Keenan isn't about to miss ballet. I love his work ethic.

Snookums promised to rub my muscles (full body) and I really want that, but I know he's going to want sex in return, and I'm not feeling that. I feel slightly bad getting him to massage me, and then backing out of sex. I know he'd be disappointed, but he'd take it in stride. Which is all the reason why I hate doing that kind of thing to him. I won't abuse his kindness and understanding. If he want's sex, I will submit. I can sleep in tomorrow.




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