LustingforNightmares

tumbleweed
2016-10-17 21:12:33 (UTC)

Dissonance


"Opium Eyes" by Attic Abasement

Your opium eyes make the sun rise
Don't always trust the ground
Don't breathe in, don't make a sound

*Everything that scares me isn't scary
I'm building little realities
And birds fly back North just to be near me
Some nights you need to dream to fall asleep*
Open your eyes, watch the sun rise
Watch time hold on as long as it can to each second
Watch my bones shrink as I die

Everything that scares me isn't scary
Wake yourself up, sniff me out and make your move
But if you fuck with us, well, we'll fuck you up
As usually, all accidents spill trust


October 17, 2016 Monday 9:14 PM


Lately, I've been really into dissonance in music. Like Prokofiev and the song ^^^ up there. There's something a little off about it, uneven. It's colored dark, stilted, unsure – kinda creepy. I dunno. It touches a weird part of me???????? I like it a lot.

I'm okay. I actually feel very content this week! It's nice.

Tomorrow, I'll see Sandwich ('cause he was gettin' married and then I was also sick)! I haven't seen him for like a week and a half! I have to ask him for a college recommendation, and Mr. Rayes – my old English teacher – and Mr. Washington, who already offered anyway.

Mr. Washington believes in me so much it makes me want to cry. Sometimes, I'm kinda scared to be around him, 'cause then he'll realize he was wrong – I'm not as amazing as he thought. I'm not brilliant and my thoughts are nothing new. I dunno.

Oh, also, I submitted a half-assed couple of short stories to a competition thing. I'm not going to re-read them because then I'll hate them. Only one of the stories is half-assed. The other, I've been writing and rewriting for like six months, but it's still not great. I don't think I'm gonna get anything in this competition and I experienced Immediate Regret after hitting "submit." WHY did I do that. Crap. So much crap.

It seems like I've got some kinda pent up words in my head, but I can't think them out...

And so fizzles this entry.




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