Snuffy

Danielito
2016-08-27 17:00:37 (UTC)

My Stance On Dating

I can't help but feel pathetic. I'm embarrassed that I think so much about finding the right girl. Embarrassed that I'm feeling hopeless and lonely.

I wish I was a different type of person. I'm in such a weird in-between because I'm not one to get on Tinder and just start sleeping with a bunch of different girls, then maybe stay with one for a while if it suits me. And I'm not going to lower my standards and settle for a girl who is just "ok" because I'm desperate and just need to be with someone. But I'm also not perfectly happy being single. I wish I didn't have this longing for companionship.

Again, I'm in this awkward in-between that's keeping me from finding resolution in the matter. I continue on in this fashion because I believe God will reward my efforts if I do things His way. I already disobeyed Him when he told me not to marry Mary. I can't now go completely the other way and start doing things the world's way. I feel like the best chance I have of finding a fulfilling relationship is by getting my temple recommend, staying close to the Spirit, and praying for guidance when dating.

It's so tempting to follow Satan's plan, though. It seems so very exciting. I imagine the thrill of hooking up with a stranger and feeling guiltless because I've convinced myself that there's nothing wrong with what I'm doing.

I might however, consider dating outside the church. I would need to do it prayerfully. The Lord might have plans for me and a girl who is ready for the Gospel. Who knows? I have avoided that path because I know how easy it is for someone to convert for the wrong reasons, then fall away from the church for good. I also fear falling in love with someone who will never be a member and it'll be "til death do us part" and she could also drag me down spiritually.

My patriarchal blessing talks about meeting a girl worthy of the temple and that we'll raise children and we'll all resurrect in the morning of the resurrection and be exalted. That ship may have sailed, but I have to believe that there's still a chance I can realize that prophecy.

So that's where I stand. My coworkers tell me I'm fooling myself when I say I want companionship. They say I don't know what I want. They criticize the fact that I'm choosing to date without drinking or having sex. "What's the point of dating?" They criticize the fact that I'm not going to have sex until I'm married. They believe it's important to test drive before you buy.

They're idiots. But they have a point: it's going to be harder for me to find a girl going about it my way versus their way. I know I've narrowed down the selection pool a lot. I know it's gonna take a miracle but I have to stick by my standards and my values.




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