Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2016-06-17 07:58:25 (UTC)

It's His Choice

I don't want to think the next few days are going to be tough, but it's kind of what I've talked myself into believing. The house is clean. We're ready. I can't think of any other preparations I should or could make. Hopefully they're coming to see us, and not how neat and tidy our home is. Or how well landscaped our yard is (because it's not. A bear could be living in the grass).

There was some monochrome of doom and gloom waking up this morning. But I know it was solely because of the deep-seeded dread of having to clean the house from top to bottom, when so often I feel like the house is a mess and no one ever helps out with it. I either have to do it myself, or accept that it will never be clean. I think that's a huge factor behind my desire to never be home. The few days off I get, the last thing I want to do is clean, so it can get destroyed the first day back to work. It's a demeaning feeling. So, fuck my whole family. I'll keep my spaces clean and they can endure clutter and chaos. I know, mother of the year over here.

I could tell Snookums wasn't overly stoked about cleaning, either. So I proposed an idea that I've always followed. When he was in the Navy and gone all the time, and when he was working nights at the casino. I'd do whatever I wanted throughout the day, then come evening that's when I'd clean. Why waste a beautiful day inside cleaning? So... we went hiking!

I took him to Gazzam Lake Wildlife Preserve. The park I took dad to for our final hike before he left for Alaska. There's a panda mural on a water tower that I posted a picture of on Instagram. Snookums voiced that he'd like to go see it, so that's what we did with our day (while the kids were at school).

Keeny had his first dance class today! Ballet. Tomorrow evening he's going back to try out a jazz class. They've got a new student special going on for summer classes. If you register for an hour a week, you get another hour free. So, he could take jazz and ballet if he likes both. Otherwise, he's going to see how he feels about jazz and then decide. He did so good, though. Honestly, for having never set foot in a dance studio before, he did so well. He followed instructions, took a little criticism. I was pleased. There was a couple times he felt silly, I could tell, but I know it's just because he wasn't totally sure what was going on. I hope he decides to stick with it, but ultimately it's on him. It's his choice.

As we planned, we came home after Keenan's dance class and got to cleaning. Annie was asleep, Keenan passed out almost as soon as we got home, but Kiki helped. She's a great little (or I guess, not so little) helper. We worked until a little after midnight (not Kiki. Snookums and I. They still have one more day of school tomorrow), but I'm entirely pleased with the way the place looks. It's not perfect, but we live here. There will always be laundry and dishes. There will also still be a need to paint the walls, but that's not happening by tomorrow. I just have to keep reminding myself they aren't coming to inspect the cleanliness of the house. That's my mother I'm thinking about.

I should probably go to bed soon. I open tomorrow. It's already starting out to be a hectic day, ugh.




Ad: