My Letter To The World
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2016-02-19 21:51:22 (UTC)

Who am I?

Mood: Guilty and Relieved
Song: See you again By Wiz Khalifa
Color: Gray

Who am i? who have i become?
I am an imperfect person...i had a really hard conversation today with my Mom and it's going to be even harder later when dad finds out...
It's a Confessions day...
It's a day that i take a hard look at who i am and who i want to be.
I've drank a few times since i turned 21 all at home never really getting drunk but my Parents who Hate alcohol for good reasons didn't know and i kept the few times hidden.
But when Hannah threw it back at me i came clean i told them because i want to practice what i preach.
I want to have a good witness and i don't want to drag anyone down by doing something that may give someone the wrong idea.
I have always hated being held to a higher standard than everyone else and having super parents who were so strict but that is the reality and i hated Disappointing her...i hated that she might think less of me.
and the drinking, the trying it, the being cool or whatever... wasn't worth that.

And maybe people will think that i'm childish still caring what they think but i do. and i don't want to hurt them, and i know this has.

SO i'm reevaluating my life.
I'm figuring out who i am and who i was and who i want to be...
I can do better than this.
I will do better than this.
I will be a 6 year old me black and white thinking innocent in thought and in action.
I will be 14 year old me not caring what others think of me doing what i believe it right even if it's hard.
I've been doing that a lot lately.
I will be the 21 year old me....who's starting over who's getting back to the basics.

Who am I?

Brand new this very day.