Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2016-02-06 08:04:51 (UTC)

I'm No Fool

I'm starting to wonder if maybe my body is fighting something. I didn't have to be to work until 5:30pm this evening. I had all day I could have gotten up and gone to the gym. My mind really wants to, but my body seems to have other ideas. Like, not doing anything. I laid in bed all morning. Took a nap this afternoon. Then reluctantly dragged myself out of bed to shower and get ready for work. It literally took all I had in me to make it happen.

Add my current state of lethargy to the fact that I have an aversion to pretty much every food I usually love (except for bananas while high), and it's probably a safe bet that I'm either coming down with a sickness, or fending one off (I don't feel any telltale signs, but who knows). I don't know what else could be causing my symptoms. Of course, everyone I've happened to mention it to thinks I'm pregnant. I'm most definitely not. At least Snookums believes me.

I got some intriguing news at work tonight. Of course, I'm sworn to secrecy, but since no one I work with reads this, I suppose its safe to tell. My manager may not be at our store anymore. She's been given the opportunity to manage a larger store that's currently struggling. The problem is, once she leaves there's no telling who could end up managing us. Or what that will mean for the current team. I get a lot of special treatment because of my position and tenure. I don't think a new manager would treat me with the same consideration that Sara does. I just don't foresee it happening. And since I'm already on the fence as it is, this could be the final nail in the coffin. I told Sara as much. She's aware of how I've been feeling. She knows my loyalty to the store is pretty much the only thing keeping me, and when she leaves, there really won't be anyone left from the "old gang". I've seen so many people come and go. So much turnover. I'm a little nervous to see what might happen next. But I won't make any hasty decisions. I'll stick around until I have something better lined up. I'm no fool.

I'm already at a disadvantage for tomorrow. I closed tonight and I open tomorrow. If I go to bed right now I'll get 6 hours of sleep. But we all know that isn't going to happen. So, I guess I'll muddle through the day, and then come home and nap. I should go to the gym, but unless I find some miraculous energy store deep within myself, it probably isn't going to happen. It's okay, though. I'm not really eating, so it's not like I'm setting myself back at all. I literally can smell the ketones every time I pee. Whether weight loss was my intention or not, it's happening.




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