My Letter To The World
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2016-02-01 06:27:12 (UTC)

Today's happenings

Mood: Nostalgic
Song: Gold forever by the Wanted.
Color: Gold

Today was good... just like i hoped it would be and it seems like it went by so fast... it's a blur.
but i want to record it in a way i rarely do as far as Journaling goes i'm going to do it in a lot of detail.

Woke up at 8:00am 30 minutes before my alarm was set to go off and i was slightly annoyed at losing that extra 30 minutes but i got up anyway.
Got ready for Church and then went down stairs...where my family wasn't near ready dispite it being 30 minutes until it was time to be at church and we got there somewhat late. it buffed out.
Class went well and i learned something i didn't know or at least saw something in a way that i'd never looked at it before.
I enjoyed Sunday school for the first time in a long time...well since we moved here anyway.
My only real thought on the matter now is that i probably should start learning people's names -_-

AND then it was time for church service and all my friends were there and it was great...i loved having them here.
I can't describe the home those people are to me... in a way the people at FBCG could never be...even if i did grow closer to them.
they don't have the history i do with my friends.
when i walked into the room they were all sitting in a long row together and i just smiled....
because those were my friends those were my people.
And i love them with all my heart.

Emma's Baptism went really well and she didn't seem scared at all.
God bless that little girl...
God i love her...like she's my own.

We came home and they played music and Brandon L and i helped mom with lunch and then my family and i and all my friends sat down at our huge long table and just talked and got along and it was one of those things that i think will stick in my mind forever...
I found myself taking pictures with my eyes alot.
after lunch we hung out drove around town and then we went to the lake.
Tristan Rode with me while the others rode with B.
Tristan told me about his travel plans about being away for a year and seeing the United states because he's barely been anywhere.
he said he was going to go totally off grid no phone or anything.
but i said that he should just get a new one with a new number and just give it to a few select people and he was like yeah thats a good idea that's probably what i'll do.
and then he said that there was only like two people he'd give the number to and i guessed correctly that one person would be Joie.
but i was shocked and pleasently so as to who the second person was cause i guessed wrong and then asked...and he said that the second person he'd give it to would be me.
Crazy right?
if you knew the history you'd be thinking this was insane.
but it made my heart feel good and i think i kinda...idk. melted a bit?
i think this is what a little brother would feel like.
If he does go...i'll miss him but i don't blame him for wanting to travel and get out of here.
specially since money isn't an issue.
Luckiest person on the planet...
but i wouldn't want to have gone thought the things he has...either.
so i guess it's not luck it's just life and a blessing from God.

After the lake we came back to the house and we all hung out in my room talking, singing and listening to music.
Brandon L asked me to draw something for him...and then asked for me to draw that moment...of all of us together... so i did i drew it as i saw it.
In Auras and It was weird while all of our Auras were all different colors...we all had flecks of gold in them...(you see at theme?)

and then they left for EC to go home...and i miss them.
missed them as soon as they were gone. i feel the emptiness when they leave...after spending so much time with them.
and just like everytime i crashed down when they were gone... and i don't know why.
but i do know that that in it's self is a sign that we are all supposed to be in eachothers lives.

We went to GBC this evening for 5th Sunday singing...
it was awkward and i had the surreal experience of what seemed like me looking at myself, my life from the outside and i didn't know how i got here or what i was doing there and i didn't recognize myself.
weird and insane i know... No i'm not actually crazy.

I came home finished the drawing from earlier.
watched some netflix.
And then sat down to write this entry before bed.
And Youtube is on autoplay...so the songs just keep playing...
like right now the song is radio active by Imagine dragons.

It's about 12:30am.
I think i'll do some reading before i try to sleep.
Good night.