Interrupted
My Life Thus Far
Out of the Muck and Mud
What a great day... Nothing spectacular to share. I'm just still marveling over how balanced and tranquil I'm feeling. Consistently. Not just some of the time. Not just when I'm really working on it. Most of the time. I'm not entirely sure when the shift happened. I went from being consistently miserable, to conscientiously striving for happiness in any way I could find it. Constantly doing the work it takes to appreciate all the good there is in my life. To now: feeling consistently happy, and always ready to shift my thinking if the need arises. I don't dwell in sorrow like I used to. I don't automatically assume terrible things will happen to me, and this is my lot in life. I'm so fortunate. Today at work, I was going about my business, helping a customer when the thought popped into my head "I have a good life". It's not materialistically rich, but I have more blessings than many people are ever fortunate enough to have. I need to remind myself of that when I start feeling like I don't have enough. It's simply not true.
Yesterday was the last day in the fiscal month for sales incentive bonus numbers. Kaitlin and I were looking at our numbers for the month, and I'm pretty sure I had the best month ever. Maybe. I'm not entirely sure, but I had a damn good month. I averaged $401/selling hour I worked. I sold just under $42,000. I personally sold over 1,000 bras. I was doing some of the math in my head (basic, very basic math), and if the average bra is $40 (either an inexpensive bra, or with a discount), that means I sold $40,000 in bras, and only $2,000 in panties and lingerie. Crazy. I can't believe that. I guess I see why I'm being asked to teach others my ways. I contribute my success to my shift in attitude. Instead of blaming others when I wasn't successful, I made it a point to work even harder if need be to overcome obstacles. If I have a shit day, I own it. No matter what. It's a great feeling doing well, but also being able to simply accept when the day doesn't go as well.
I had a rough start today (returns, exchanges, technical difficulties with registers). I only had $133 in the first two hours, but by the time I left my sales/hour number was $353. Not too shabby. It felt good leaving for my weekend on a high note. I was telling one of my coworkers (who congratulated me on some good sales I had), it isn't about the money. It definitely isn't about being better than anyone else. It's entirely about bettering myself, and knowing that I've put forth my best effort. If I did my best and left nothing on the table, I can't expect more than that. Which is what I did today. I had to work hard for it today. Not gonna lie. I'm proud of myself :)
I've got the next two days off, a short shift on Wednesday, and then Thursday off. So, it's an easy week for me. Tomorrow Annie and I are going to Seattle to look for her Homecoming dress. I feel slightly guilty about letting her miss school for it... but not really. Life's short. Play hooky! It won't be long before she leaves for college. I need to spend more time with her alone (without her little siblings). When I was pregnant with her, I used to love watching The Gilmore Girls. I hoped that someday we'd have a relationship like Rory and Lorelai... and I think we do. As close as real people can get to tv characters. She's a great kid. Out of the muck and mud of my life, came my flower. She's my lotus.
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