Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2015-07-30 07:57:40 (UTC)

Fuck What I Want

I'm so irritated with my husband right now. It's such a stupid little thing, but still. I'm irritated. I haven't missed a single day of writing since I started back up in March. My daily entry helps ground me, and makes me feel like there's a continuity to my life. Things are all part of a routine. Writing is important to my sense of normalcy. I need it. Something is wrong with our internet connection. My laptop doesn't seem to be able to connect to our wifi, and therefore can't access this site. He doesn't care. I'm on the verge of tears, because I just want to write, and he doesn't care. If he wanted to use his computer it would be the biggest fucking deal. But no. He doesn't, so fuck what I want. He just rolled over and went to sleep. Thank goodness for my phone. My eyes hurt trying to look at the tiny print, and tapping this out is painstaking, but it's something. I'll take it. And I'll try to stop feeling such strong feelings of resentment, because he doesn't find what's important to me, important as well.

I have no desire for small talk tonight. It's too hard to ramble mindlessly when I'm tapping this out with my thumbs. Somehow this is his fault. I'm not sure how, but I'm sure I'll figure it out tomorrow.




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