rainy

My heart in a knot
2015-06-30 18:52:24 (UTC)

Free speech (isn't free)

After writing last night I started to think about a lot of things, especially things related to the Internet and the amount of social issues going on right now in our society. And I've had to take in something very important, an understanding that I had never grasped in my younger years, and that's that free speech really isn't free, it comes at a cost.


First off, you will never be able to make everyone happy, people will always find a way to criticism you even if you try your hardest to please everyone. I have heard that phrase a million times as a kid "you can't please everyone" but it didn't really mean anything until now. My problem is that I feel such a strong need to make everyone happy, I'm always looking for the middle ground, I just feel the need to accommodate everyone so they can feel free to be who they want. But life just doesn't work that way. For example, after the ruling allowing same sex marriages many people took to the Internet to to express their concern, dissatisfaction or hate and it's hard to take in but I guess everyone is entitled to their own opinions right? so it seems to reasonable solution would be to separate groups, but that's where things are nearly impossible, despite the fact that they are many of online threads in which people can go to express their dissatisfaction with the ruling many felt the need to go to specific lgbt themed pages to express themselves.


I don't know, I wish I had better words to describe what I'm trying to say. The thing about free speech is that not everyone has to agree with you, but if they have a level of power they can force you to not speak or take your freedoms away. And as an absolute horror they could possible take your life, and sometimes these events happen all over the world rather they are intentional or through "accidents" or mysterious conditions. That's why journalism is one of the most dangerous jobs on earth. At one point in my life I wanted to be a journalist but it's truly dangerous, and after learning that I decided it was too much for me, I'd rather combat social issues from a different angel than to be the one reporting it. But I really admire journalist, especially ones who tell things as they happen being objective and impartial.

I used to be offended by a lot of things people said, and somethings people say are downright nasty and shocking to say the least. But as I've grown as a person I've started to see how what people say is more often a reflection of them and not so much what they may be speaking on. Also... people can change their opinions on things..which is why it's important not to take everything people say serious as well as being able to distinguish what was said out of an emotion (anger, sadness, fear, misunderstanding..etc) or because of psychological or external conditions (the weather, a medical condition, the influence of a substance, mood disorder..etc) I've gotten a lot better at reading people and the things that they say.

I put in 3 job applications today which gives me a total of 10 in the last 4 days. As I was putting in my applications and reading the job descriptions I was reminded that "this is not what I want to do", I want a job in my field doing what I want to do, which is research, but that will require a Masters degree at minimum, ideally a PhD. That's going to require me to continue with school, so I've decided to hold off on anymore job applications until I set up plans for what I want to do as far as my education is concerned. Right now things seem daunting. The university I'm at offers a masters program but I've had a terrible experience there so far and don't feel they've really prepared me to be competitive. My next dilemma is that the other prominent schools in my area are highly competitive, meaning I have a low chance of getting in. I could go out of state, but then I'd have to pay out of state tuition as well as figure out living arrangements.


Either way I'm going to figure something out, that will be on my agenda for the rest of this week and whatever I come up with I'll come and write about it.





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