My Letter To The World
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2015-05-27 03:09:28 (UTC)

A-Z Challenge (C) Feedback

Cracked: Damaged and showing lines on the surface from having split with out coming apart.
Having Damage but usually not broken into pieces.

Have you ever thought to yourself "wow that definition really fits all uses of that word?"
Phhh probably not because thats the point right? The definition explains the word... Sure enough but sometimes i don't think the definition does the word justice... In this case i think that it is perfect.
The definition fits the word in the physical sense and in the emotional sense.

Cracked... Something i certainly am.
I would have once said Broken...not cracked broken...
I would have once said i was a broken person and it would have sort of been true but also sort of not.
I have been through things that left me feeling broken.
I have lost My brother and others i loved to death.
I have lost friends to distance and to betrayal.
I have tried so hard and failed even so.
I have been accused, abused, wronged and mistreated.
Those things have left me feeling broken but they haven't broken me or else... I wouldn't be here yet here i am but even so those things changed me, grew me, they left their scars some deeper than others.
They along with all the positive things in my life have made me who i am both the positive aspects and the negitive aspects.
I'm not Broken...just cracked.
My cracks show through on the surface... They show in my shyness and in my hesitance to trust people(Friends) with my heart...with my darkest thoughts and most negitive feelings.
But i find that Salt and Pepper at least...Have continued on with me they keep pushing at my walls and i don't think they are going to desert me no matter what... Same as i would never leave them...but that same fear keeps coming around.
There are other areas that my cracks show through as well... But i think everything happens for a reason and maybe i'll be able to help someone else because of these things...maybe you have one of the same cracks as me?
Maybe we could help eachother...maybe thats the point.
And plus E.B White says: "Genious is more often found in a cracked pot than in a whole one"
I agee.

But i think John Green sums it up beautifully.

"Maybe its like you said before, all of us being cracked open
Like each of us starts out a watertight vessel. And then things happen
These people they leave us, or don't love us, or don't get us, or we don't
Get them, and we lose and we fail and we hurt one another and the
Vessel starts to crack in places.
And i mean yeah once the vessel cracks open the end becomes
Inevetable once its starts to rain in the osprey, it will never be remodeled.
But there is all this time inbetween when the crackes start opening up and
When we finally fall apart.
And its only that time that we see one another beacuse we see out of ourselves
Through our cracks and into others through theirs. When did we see eachother
Face to face? Not until you saw into my cracks and i saw into yours.
Before that we were just looking at ideas of each other like looking at your window
Shade but never seeing inside.
But once the vessel cracks the light can get in, the light can get out."
-John Green (Paper Towns.)

That quote explains it all...
Strong walls can crack just like the hardest heart can break cracks are just a reminder that you can fall apart no matter how strong you are.
We are all cracked...sure but we are only broken if we choose to be.
But i think we are supposed to take the things that happen to us the things that scars us and crack us open to help other people so that the light can get in and can then get out.