rainy

My heart in a knot
2015-05-14 19:22:30 (UTC)

judging..

The other day my aunt came to my house (and she never comes over) and asked me to photograph my little cousin in his tuxedo at a community garden with his girlfriend, the reason being is that they are having prom this coming Saturday.

I told her I would but it honestly kind of set me in a negative mood, mostly because I remember all the negative things that I read on his girlfriend's twitter page and have come to view her in a negative light, plus I just enjoy taking photos for fun and I'm in no way a professional, I don't even really enjoy taking photos of people actually.


But of course I started to think about things because I'm a rational and reasonable person. I realized that the very writing that I do here on this site is often very negative and depressing and I wouldn't want someone to judge me solely off of my writings here that don't represent me in entirety. It's possible that this girl could be suffering from a serious medical condition, I just say that because if her post aren't about something negative it's about some pain she is having, everything from headaches to her spine she has complained about having pain and it seems to be constant, if that's the case her pains could be influencing her to be kind of negative and scornful.


Either way, unless they cancel the request at the last minute (I think it's going to rain) then I'll go try my best.


Another thing I've been thinking about is how my life seems to be in a standstill, which is why I'm so happy I'm taking such a major step and quitting my job and not really thinking about it. I've been spending time on social networking sites like facebook, youtube and instagram looking at the lives of other people, and one trend that I've noticed is that people who you would otherwise think would be unhappy and miserable are out here getting the most out of life, by the way don't interpret that as me saying they are happy because you simply cannot gauge someone's level of happiness through photos and video, only assumptions can be maid. But what I'm saying is that they are out here doing something, rather that's seeing new things and going new places or just experiencing life on the edge... I'm tired of living a routine life, I want to experience a little excitement, sometimes you just have to take a chance if you want things to change.


Anyway.. I think I'm going to watch a movie before I go to sleep tonight, I have to work tomorrow morning and I'll tell more people that I'm leaving soon. They also approved 5 days of vacation time for me so I'm glad about that. I will work for 2 weeks, then have my vacation time, after my vacation time I will have about 2 weeks of work left and then the 14th of June will be my last day. I have been cycling through feeling very nervous and very excited the last few days, I think it will only get worst as the days go along.

I had more that I wanted to write about but I'm getting kind of tired, I hope to come write again soon before my summer classes start next week.





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