Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2015-05-09 07:07:02 (UTC)

I Can Feel Negativity Seeping In

My laptop has informed me that it plans on shutting down in 14 minutes to perform some updates. I couldn't postpone it any longer. I've been putting it off for days. I'd love to know why it can't perform some of it's mundane maintenance functions while it's sitting idle all day. I only use it at night to write. Oh well. Whatever. I'll be done in 14 minutes. I'm tired tonight, and really don't have much to say.

I closed for the first time since I can't remember when. Sometime the beginning of last month, I think. I forgot how much I dislike closing. My body is used to being in bed by 10pm, not still at work. Even if I'm not asleep, I'm not working, either. I hope I'm done with closing for the month (wishful thinking, I'm sure).

There isn't much to say about today. I slept in this morning, then took my sweet time getting ready for work. So much so, I made myself late. I kicked myself all the way to work, because I've been trying to be better about that. It isn't okay for me to be late, no matter what my position is in the store. It's a level of accountability all of us must own up to. Set the example, and all of that bullshit. I need to not allow myself to feel entitled to special treatment, just because they screwed me. They know they screwed me. I know they screwed me. And nobody wants to piss me off, because they fear I'll quit. I can't lie and say the thought hasn't crossed my mind several dozen times. I'm better than I was a few months ago, but every now and then I still feel bitter. I can't remember if I shared what happened. I don't have time tonight, but trust me, it was fucked up.

I guess I'm kind of in a spicy mood tonight. Not quite as zen as I'd like. I did finally stop at Barnes & Noble for that deck of yoga pose cards. I haven't used them yet, but I definitely want to start making that a priority. I can feel negativity seeping in. It's probably PMS. Not even exaggerating. My period is 2 days late (and counting).




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