Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2015-04-27 05:30:43 (UTC)

Unattainable

My first day back to work after 10 days off was about as painful as I expected it to be. I didn't want to get up, or get dressed, or drive there, or be there. I don't think it has anything to do with the work I do, or where I work. I just want a break from working so dang much in general. I sometimes wish I could be a stay at home mom... but then I remember that every time I've tried that, I've ended up feeling miserable. Working part-time would be ideal, but until my beloved husband gets his life in order, that isn't in the cards. One of us has to work. This isn't me being bitter. Really. I feel fortunate to be able to provide for my family, even if I wish we had more. Getting by is better than not getting by, but not by much.

I won a $100 gift card at work for selling the most bras during some specified time frame I can't remember. Honestly, those kinds of incentives have always felt very unattainable, so I never bother trying. I always do my best, but winning prizes has never been a goal. So, I was a bit surprised. I think I'll save it for after the new store opens and we have a wider selection of merchandise... or I'll use it on Annie for her birthday. We'll see. It's crazy that the new store is actually that close. I'm a little nervous about it. I'm still waiting it out to see if this is something I want to stick around for. Part of me still wonders if I'll feel the same way about VS when I'm working in a much larger store. I keep going back and forth about it, but ultimately it isn't something I'll know until I'm there.

I've been feeling really tired and a little fuzzy the past couple days. I'm attributing it to allergies, because it's really the only change in my life (coming back to Washington). I want to feel the way I felt in Hawaii. Whatever it is I'm allergic to can get lost. I've been playing with the idea of moving to Hawaii. I easily could transfer to a store there. Perhaps Waikiki. It's just a pipe dream. I don't think I'd actually want that. I know Snookums isn't excited about the idea, but man I miss the sun and warmth!




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