Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2015-03-24 07:47:15 (UTC)

Ginger Ale and Cucumber Vodka

I can already tell tonight is going to be one of those nights I'll regret in the morning (it's almost 1am). I feel really great right now. Could be I had a good day in general, could be the afterglow from great sex, could be the glass of ginger ale and cucumber vodka, or all the above. Who knows, I'm just going to enjoy the good vibes :)

As the days go by, and I get closer to my trip, I'm starting to feel the teensiest bit excited about it. I'm less fearful than I was the days before I booked my flight, or even the day I booked, which is good. Sometimes I have a tendency to make things out to be much more than they really are (in my head). All of the worst case scenario stuff. Ultimately, everything will be planned out. I haven't booked a hotel, but that was intentional. I want to drive around, get a feel for the place, and then decide on a place. But, not having that figured out in advance is slightly bothersome.

Today's lesson was about misery. When we feel suffering, it means that we are focusing on the pain. Just as a cup of salt
is completely tasteless in an entire lake, if we expand our consciousness, the suffering is lessened and hardly noticeable. It's a great visualization. I can definitely see myself using this as a meditation technique. I struggle with focusing on the pain/anger/frustration/negative. Instead of zeroing in on the bad, I'm going to attempt to redirect myself to something positive.

I know it hasn't been long since I started back up writing. A little more than a week. But, I feel like it's doing me worlds of good. I'm not going to lie, I miss my "followers" from back in the day. I used to get lots of feedback, words of encouragement, or even praise sometimes. Now that anonymous support is gone. This is still an excellent outlet for me. Feedback or not. Today I'm thankful for my diary and grateful that I'm able to express my feelings and write freely.




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