My Letter To The World
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2015-02-10 22:29:09 (UTC)

Silence sadness, awkward and right.

Its a very, very weird thing to be around someone who no longer talks to you or has anything to do with you any more when you were once best friends...
it's odd to watch your life and their life go on and continue in different direction yet your still connected in small ways...like with the church you go to or the mutual friends you may have.
It's odd and sad to know so much about the person, to know their likes and dislikes, their Hurts and heart breaks to know their struggles and there victory's to know what they are good at and what they aren't to know what they hope and dream for.
to have a history with them that spans years, you have all these private jokes that may still come up in your life but you can't call or text or tell them about it and share that with them ever again because the friendship is over.
The memories are still there.
The knowledge of that person is still there.
But who that person was to me...isn't there anymore.

It's Silent, there is no talking no words there is nothing we have probably said 10 words to each other in the past 6-7 months.

It's sad, because something that once was somewhat good is now gone and you can't break a friendship with out it leaving scars there is never a clean break.

It's Awkward because there are still going to be situations that we will be around each other in and we have to deal with the sadness and the silence and the history...and the fact that there is nothing now yet we still know so much about each other(but that's I guess a good thing about time...is it will change us and that the things we know about each other...will probably change and fade away as well.

It's also right.
because we were both holding each other back from becoming the people who we wanted to be and I guess we were just both hurting each other, I know she was hurting me a lot... but betrayal will do that to you.
though she say I hurt her to... so it goes both ways...
we both bruise so easily.
Now we are both free to go down our separate roads...now we are free of...each other.
and as much as it saddens me, I know it's right.
I know I will grow and move forward to bigger things better friendships and different places and as much Bad blood as there is in that situation I truly and honestly wish her the best and hope she does the same.