Screened In Porch

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2014-08-20 12:31:55 (UTC)

Hoping for a better day

After the disappointing week and finally dealing with it
yesterday as far as the money and telling him about it,
I am feeling a little better. But it still is very painful
to know that the one person you thought you could trust
with your life was really robbing you blind. My heart
is broken from this. I would never have saw this coming.

It is not like she is on drugs or anything. It is not like
I have not bent over backwards to help her, to motivate her
and try to show her love. I have been doing that. But
somewhere she along the line, she must have broke the tie
that bind us.

I would have given her that money if she had ask for it.
I would have paid every single bill and much more if
she had ask. But to take my account information and just
use it without telling me anything. I was shocked when
I saw that minus balance in my account. What in the hell
would I have done if I was out of town and that was the
only card I had with me? How would I have got home?
What if I was stuck on the side of the road and needed
a wrecker to help me out and that card would not work?

Sometimes our children go bad. I did not see this coming.
Things were going so well. She was bragging about her
up coming deal and all she was going to do and how she
was looking forward to getting more as her phone had
began ringing again with qualified buyers who were ready
to start looking now.

Even with that new part time job, she was excited to be
back in this business again. I had reached out to help
her in every aspect of it. I turned on the internet at
her house...paid all the dues which were not cheap as
I have to pay my own as well. I was living my days
with excitement of working with her again...looking
so forward to being by her side again. Then the
bubble burst this week. She had used my account
without my knowledge....to pay a phone bill and buy
school clothes for the kids. I was wondering why
she turned me down to take them shopping for school
clothes. She was probably afraid I would find out
I had no money in that account. Again, I am
shocked still. But he helped me through it.

Once again. He was the hero.

My phone rang last night from the house I have under
contract. The lady is looking for a house just like
that one and she is a cash buyer. I told her it
was currently under contract but I could still show
it as it is not a done deal until later. She told
me how much she can spend and what she wants. So,
once again, a call from a complete stranger has
lifted my spirits and gave me a reason to move
on...get up off the bed Pat....start living the
life you worked so hard to have. I did that
last night.

I found three properties to show that lady. I will
be previewing them today and giving her an update
tonight.

Tonight, I plan on going out to eat at T bones on the lake
with my BFF who is on medical leave. We are going to
go have a steak, drink a cold beer and listen to
some live music. I am not telling her about this
horrible thing my daughter did too me. How do you
say those words? I would not want anyone to know
that my daughter would treat me this way.

But me knowing it is a start to a new way of looking
at things. I will have to be on guard with her.
I am not sure why all this happened. But I will
take some time to work through it.

But in the mean time, I will be moving forward, making
things happen and stick to at least my part of the
plan.

Hopefully teaching by example with be more than
words could show.

More than words.

I still feel like I been kicked in the stomach.
I still feel that for some reason along the way
even with all my efforts to help her, she truly
does not love me. She does not love me.

Hard to say out loud.
But that is the way it appears.

I need to accept it and move on.

I need to continue to move on....

I will be changing my WILL so I do not have her
in charge my my life when I get older...
she would probably be one of those people who
keep you in a back room starving or dead while
all along they cash your SS checks...until
someone notices. What if no one did?

I did not notice this for a long time.
Maybe it was there all along and my love
for her blinded me from the truth.

She has treated me poorly for while...
a few years.....

Most daughters call their moms...include their moms...

she has been neglecting our relationship.....

and now this.

The big FUCK YOU MOM!

The big FUCK YOU!

I get it now.

Still hard to believe

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