sft

A Subs Space... OVER 18!
2014-07-07 14:43:49 (UTC)

14 months today

i have been with my Master 14 months today.Its not a special number,not a special month...but i always think of how long we've been together,and try to think positively about how far ive come during His Ownership of me.
But today isnt a particularly good day for me.
There are a number of things on my mind...none of which i care to air here or anywhere else.
The pain is returning,and i'm so sick of it already and its only been 2 weeks!
Another step further tomorrow...but then another painful wait :(

ive decided i'm NOT a pain slut :(((

************
5.45pm

Being alone gives you time to think...sometimes too much time to think.
i need to be kept busy,which just isn't an option at the moment :(
i can't focus on anything for too long right now.i've stopped wanting to play...partly because i can't with the pain,and partly because it just seems pointless.i don't need to orgasm without Him.i need Him to be there when i do.It just seems such a waste,when i can save it all for Him.
i used to love nothing more than to mess around,whenever i could.Now freetime doesn't mean that much to me.i'd rather be edging for Him than having pointless orgasms.

So i'm not a cum slut either!Lol
WTF am i these days???
Confused is a really good description at the moment.Slightly depressed,fatigued,bored,irrational,scared.

i don't know...my head is cluttered and i think i need time out :(




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