rainy

My heart in a knot
2012-07-26 20:38:31 (UTC)

bored..

So I've been feeling so bored lately, today we had our first review session for our final on next Tuesday, when I got home I didn't do a bit of studying I just lacked the motivation, I've been lacking a lot of motivation right now actually, but surprisingly I'm doing quite well in the class to be feeling so disconnected lately.

I really just think my brain wants a break from all this studying and worrying I've been doing. I started to worry again today about the cost of living in the house we are going into in a few weeks, I started to wonder would it be better, cheaper and safer to move into some apartments I looked up that don't seem too bad and are reasonably priced for a 1 bed room. It's so confusing because you often hear that it's cheaper and better to live in a apartment but I have also heard many horror stories from people who live in apartments so you would think the house would be the better deal.. I'm also thinking about how much this whole house owning stuff cost..


I realized today that I was never taught these life skills in school, in fact many of the math problems I've had have dealt with banks and how to save money and calculate interest and things of that sort, but I don't recall any problems about rather it was cheaper to own or to rent, and if an apartment was better then a house.. I hate that I don't know or can't seem to understand how this house property works.. how do people even calculate how much rent should be paid? I've compared prices of rent in different areas and there never seems to be a huge difference, I haven't heard of anyone paying less then $500 a month in rent unless you are on some housing assistance program, but even then they are still expected to pay at least $100 or so.. of course I don't know, I only know what I've heard and it may not be accurate.

I don't like feeling ignorant about a subject, which is why I'm going to teach myself some gardening skills, they have a short class at the local library in a few weeks about how to grow vegetables inside during the cold season which is coming up, I don't know yet if I will attend the class but hopefully I will. I want to learn how to grow my own food so I can spent less on my grocery bill.


I rented this book from the library called "eat smart, eat raw", and it has a ton of recipes that only use 2 or 4 ingredients and that to me is so convenient because it means you don't need to buy all this extra stuff which just cost more money. I have only had the time to briefly look through the book but many of the recipes sound very interesting like tomato chips, made only with tomatoes. I haven't attempted any of the recipes yet but I will once the semester is over on Tuesday, hopefully on my next shopping trip I will have chosen a recipe I want to try and hopefully it will be good..


I didn't even choose this book because I was trying to eat more healthy, but when ever I would want to make something new I would look up the recipe and it would be this entire long list of ingredients you needed which would be so inconvenient and costly. I hope this book offers me some easy to make items that are also good. The book didn't have photos of the recipes either but if I make one that's good I'll take a photo of it and recommend it to people. I'm most excited about attempting the tomato chips because they sound interesting and tomatoes are cheap. plus I like the veggie chips at the store.

I think eating more healthy would be good for my moods also.. lately I've been upset and worried... I've been thinking a lot about "K" and having many negative emotions... I noticed when I was a vegetarian I didn't have so much worry and negative emotions, now that I'm no longer a vegetarian I realize that it was not so much the meat but more of the ingredients I was consuming.. I feel a lot better now although I feel my brain is being deprived because of lack of social interactions with other people..


Well... I am getting up at 6am tomorrow, it's the only early morning rise I will have during my next 2 weeks at work, I'm going to have a lot of free time on my hands during the next few weeks once classes are done but I'm sure I'll find something to do... by the way I calculated today how much I have been spending on gas and right now I spent a average of $62 a month on gas!, I know there are other people spending way more then that but for me that's a lot, in fact I wish we had a better public transportation system here.




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