rainy

My heart in a knot
2011-09-06 15:53:28 (UTC)

Minerals...lab

I would like to say that I'm having an extremely difficult time understanding minerals.. but reality is that Geology lab is causing me great stress. Just the social aspect of it is extremely debilitating. I am there trying to focus on the material but it all just falls apart before me. I just write what ever I think it is..

The point is to learn the material and apply it, but how can I apply it if I can't function in the room... it's so stressful. I get a headache every time I leave that lab.

After lab I went and got an oil change at the same crappy place as the last time.. I don't know why I went back, maybe some type of psychological hold is on me. Or I think it was the $19.95 price of the oil change, of course it ended up being $25.. anyway I think that's the last oil change I'll do for a while.. I'm worried about my car but will be more worried about it once I move.

Speaking of moving, it still hasn't happened yet. I don't think the house is complete yet, and my dad is going in for another operation soon, so I don't know when it will happen. But when it does I need to be prepared but I'm not..

Sean is moving.. he's going to another city that's about 40minutes away.. I was a little upset when he first said he was going but I guess I just need to find other people to talk to.. life sucks.

There is a parade coming up soon and I want to try to make it, I was invited by the girl I met online. I am already being pessimistic and saying I doubt I will end up able to attend.. I think what I will do is request the day off anyway and even if I chicken out I can still use the day for studying.. however that will put a damper on my money for rent, if by then I have even moved out. Because I'm only working weekends right now.. of course my biggest problem right now is trying to concentrate when I'm here on campus.. it seems like geology class is doing me in..

We will get our test grades back today for math class...the algebra one.. I'm nervous because I don't feel to confident about it. I wish I could just understand this stuff...

So concentration has really been an issue for me.. but right now I'm here using the public computers and it sucks.. I hate taking my laptop because I don't want it to get damaged but I really hate public computers.. I almost always get stuck sitting beside someone who smells or, who makes strange noises... like the guy beside me now.. errrr.


I just need to figure this concentration thing out.. I wish that I had not watched the lyme movie yesterday, it really got me back into this assumption that I do have lyme.. it's such an annoying thing to me right now.. Right now I think I'm going to go with the idea that I don't have it and that I need a better diet, which I am going to start working on...especially when I get my own place.. I should be able to have more space for things.. unless my sister decides she want to take over which she is liable to do.

I have 2 hours until my class starts, in that time I should find something to eat before I pass out. I made some gluten free mac and cheese, but it's not good, it's not even worth the .99 that I paid for it.

I been thinking a lot about kay lately.. I think it's because the other day at work I saw a girl who looked so much like her, I had to do a double take when I saw her, she was mostly the same height, same style and body type.. and she wore her hair the same.. and it was the same light brown color too..she really could be mistaken for her, it's scary. Anyway she seemed really nice.


It's just geology that is getting to me, I just hate that lab, I should do ok on the test though.

I'm going now.




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