PROZAC

Love, loathe, repeat.
2010-11-03 11:13:32 (UTC)

The more I give the less I get.

So yesterday I ended up helping a mate out with his painting and decorating, it's
basically what he's training me up to do as a job, which knocks my current out of the
water. We ended up going for a drink at 10, we went to some plastic shithole, the kind
that students lapup with their hands held out begging for more.

The second we got there covered in paint and other bits and pieces, a good 70% of
people just looked at us, as if they had never seen someone after a hard days graft.
Later on a bird asked to borrow a lighter, np. The comment she said was quite
hilarious though, "what have you guys been doing? Painting or something?" "er...
Yeah... Something like that" "Aw bless you" wtf?

Anyway, few drinks later and this mate started telling me shit to do with Suz, like how
4 weeks ago she told him she wished she never went out with me, and that she
should of taken his offer about a month before we met to go out. He said he bigged
me up, and told her to fuck off etc. But then it went further than that. Months ago when
we were out drinking, she and our mate walked off to talk, leaving me and shell (his
bird) and she was all questioning our relationship then. He made her think sense and
we had a really good night together after that. So overall, the whole looking at 5
months in 10 days, we should of been broken up about 3 months ago.

I was honestly thinking at work, you know what, if she ends up talking to me and
asking if we want to go for a drink and talk as mates to see how it goes etc, I'd give it
a chance, probably fail horribly, but still, I'd try.

Now? After hearing everything I heard? This guy doesn't bullshit, not when he's telling
you something like this. If I see her out, if she stops me, or I see her at the pub
tonight, i'm sorry but fuck that. It sounds harsh as fuck, even evil but this girl is dead to
me, after hearing everything, over analysing everything in our relationship, she never
loved me, she never wanted to be in the fucking thing, this relationship was over
before it started, so fuck you.

I'm besides myself now that you are gone.




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