Jaeu

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2009-09-24 15:43:34 (UTC)

I know you well enough to know you never loved me.

I bet you're glad i'm gone, I bet your life is so much
easier while mine is completely fucked. Do you cry
yourself to sleep like me? Are you even in pain? I bet
you're smiling right now, not a fucking care in the world,
it's been a day and i've broken down, you probably don't
even care.

Yesterday all I did was cry myself to sleep, I didn't end
up going to the Jolly with my brother like we normally do
on a Wednesday, because I couldn't stop crying. Did you go
to school? Hell, I bet you went out after and had a great
night out.

I don't even know if i'm meant to get in touch with you,
maybe you want me to beg you to take me back, I guess you
don't, not when you still want your ex inside of you, i'm
so fucking stupid. I guess i'll keep checking your
facebook page like normal, over and over every day just to
see your face. I give it 4 months before you're with
someone, and then I get to feel even worse than I do right
now.

I don't think i'll be going to work this weekend, how am I
meant to do anything when i'm so broken down. Last time we
had a really emotional conversation and I went to work I
told my manager to go fuck herself, maybe this time i'll
just walk out, maybe I should go.

I wonder how long it'll be before you get in touch, you
didn't bother last time because your life was so perfect,
I guess i'll never see you again. I hate being alive, I
hate always feeling so fucking depressed, for once I was
happy and this is what happens. You're the only person
i've been myself with, the only person i've loved, and
this is what happens. What's the fucking point.

I haven't talked in days and i'm really not too sure What
I sound like anymore.

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