Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2009-05-19 07:18:03 (UTC)

Military Advancement

This morning I was convinced that my computer was dying a
slow death (the fan wouldn't stop running, it was loading
really slowly, ignoring commands, closing windows without
warning), but now it seems to be fine. Whatever. I'm a
technological cripple and only know enough to operate the
thing. I just hope it holds on for awhile longer. I
couldn't stand to lose my primary connection to Snookums
(even though the email system on the ship is STILL down
and I haven't heard from him in over a week). Not to
mention my dear diary :)

I had a great day - the usual Monday, but there is
something that has been weighing heavily on my mind all
day. I have that young sailor I met on myspace to thank
for it. That's what I get for even talking to him
(although him bringing it up in conversation wasn't the
first time it's crossed my mind). I've worked myself up
more than necessary, I'm sure, but it's still getting to
me. Jason is going on his 12th year in the Navy and try as
he might, he hasn't been able to advance to 1st class. I'm
worried. I'm worried that he's not going to make it and
will be pushed out of the Navy at 15 years. Failure to
advance is starting to look like the killer of his
military career (based on his past performance). I've
mentioned this to him before (it happened to my uncle. He
was forced into retirement at 15 years because he didn't
make 1st), but he just kind of pushes my concerns aside.
He's still optimistic that he'll advance and everything
will be okay - and that's a good thing, don't get me
wrong, but he's taken the test 4 times and while he
passes, he never advances.

I read a statistic that said the average Petty Officer has
11.3 years in before making 1st. Jason is going on 12
years. Maybe I'm worrying prematurely, but I can't help
it. I'm an expert worrier and my husband is lazy and
unmotivated (I love him to death, but it's true). Those
two things together are a bad combination when it comes to
something as competitive as military advancement. What can
I do? If he doesn't work for it or really want it, there's
nothing I can do about it. If he ends up working a dead-
end, thankless shipyard job for the next 30 years (like
the other unmotivated sailors the Navy doesn't want
anymore) because he has to support his family, then that
is his fate. I'll do my part. I'll get a "real" job and
contribute as best I can and we'll be fine... Like I said,
I think I'm worrying prematurely...

It's after midnight and I haven't eaten anything yet. I'm
not sure if I will. I don't feel like it. Worry will do
that to you. I've had coffee, tea and diet soda. If it
were possible to overdose on caffeine, I'm sure I'm close.
Sunday night I ordered pizza for the kids and ate a couple
of pieces. It was only cheese pizza, but for some reason
it tore my stomach up! I've been in pain most of the day.
I hate IBS. It seems like the healthier I eat on a regular
basis, the more I suffer when I go astray. How do I eat
crap when Snookums' home without dropping dead
instantaneously? I don't know. I'm going to bed now...
Ciao.




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