Interrupted
My Life Thus Far
Quibbling Female Needs
Normally around this time my second wind starts kicking
in, but I can tell that it's not happening tonight. I'm
worn out and that's all there is to it. I need to go to
sleep.
I could have kissed Amy when I got home from work tonight.
The house was a mess when I left and I expected it to be
the same or worse when I got home. That girl cleaned
everything. The living room was spotless, the dishes done,
the toys picked up. She even vacuumed. It's one less thing
I have to do tonight. I try to show Amy how much I
appreciate her on a regular basis (she's a wonderful
sitter), but I think I should kick her a little extra next
week. Maybe a PINK gift card.
Today was Military Spouse Appreciation Day. I made a point
to thank every military spouse I know for what they do. I
wasn't expecting it in return (which was a good thing,
because no one knew there was a Military Spouse
Appreciation Day and if they did, I didn't hear anything
back from them), but it still felt good to thank others in
a similar situation as me. At times it feels utterly
thankless, lonely, immensely difficult, torturous and
pointless (I really could go on). Sometimes I want to give
up. I need a maid, a nanny, a personal assistant, a
counselor and a financial planner, but instead I'm all
those things and at times I feel like if one more thing is
added to my life I'm going to lose it. Yet, I rarely get a
thank you. Snookums is too busy to coddle my quibbling
female needs. I don't expect him to thank me (we're in
this together) and I don't need constant affirmation that
I'm doing the right thing - I know I am. I have to keep
reminding myself that what I do is important. It may seem
like thankless drudgery, but it's not. I keep my husband's
home running smoothly so he can go to work. His work just
happens to be navigating an aircraft carrier. Jason has
never been one to call himself a hero, but I think he is.
Not many are willing or able to do what he does and I
suppose the same can be said for my job. That doesn't make
me a hero (not even close) - just insane :) I need to go
to bed before I become anymore idealistic. Ciao.
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