Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2009-04-03 07:27:01 (UTC)

Where's The Wisdom In Hate?

After 8 years of wondering how she's been and what her
life is like now, I got back in contact with my best
friend from high school. I got a myspace message yesterday
from Tony, a mutual friend and Brie's ex-boyfriend from
10th and 11th grade (she was in 10th, he was in 11th). I
dated him too, but that was a short-lived thing that both
of us decided was a horrible idea (since my best friend
was obviously in love with him and he was just another guy
to me - a better friend than boyfriend). Anyhow, he sent
me a message saying he'd found Brie on Facebook. I've got
a Facebook account, but I never use it. So, I logged on
last night and found her. We've been sending messages back
and forth all day, catching up. Finally, I was able to
share with her all the things I was going through, but
could never tell her then. Finally I could explain my
secrecy. Something I was dying to do since we became
friends in the 9th grade. It's really great talking with
her again. We were so close in high school. Mainly fueled
by a mutual need to be ourselves in a world that wanted us
to be anything but. We were opposites in every sense of
the word, but we loved each other nonetheless.

Reliving those high school days brought back both the good
and bad memories. I can't say I had a hard time in high
school. I really didn't, but the kids were brutal to Brie
and that was hard for me to watch. I tried to be an
ambassador between the "popular" kids and The Outcasts
(that was what we called our group of friends), since I
was slightly higher on the popularity totem pole than a
lot of them (being a cheerleader will do that for you).
Brie was mocked and ridiculed at every turn. After talking
with her about those days and then logging into myspace, I
looked at all the friends I have from high school and saw
them in a totally different light. Not as people that went
to the same school at the same time as I, but for how they
treated Brie back then. It's safe to say at least 10 of
them need to be deleted. I feel silly. Having such strong
emotions about events that transpired 10-12 years ago, but
I can't help it. Part of me wants to delete my myspace
account all-together and defect to Facebook totally like
so many other friends of mine have. Out of the two social
networking sites, Facebook is more mature (in my opinion)
and is more centered around communication, not so much
about who's got a pretty profile or the latest song. I
don't know. The whole thing is dumb. Feeling bad about the
past, grappling with popularity and cliques. I'm so beyond
that. I'm a grown ass woman, thank you very much!

My time at the gym is supposed to be relaxing, but not
today. I actually left a little pissed off. During the day
the gym is full of older people. I hate to sound like a
disrespectful young person, but if I do so what. I don't
think older people (60 ) deserve any more respect than any
other person of any other age. Just because they've lived
a little longer than some doesn't automatically make them
wise or right or worthy of my respect. I respect everyone
equally, regardless of external factors (age, sex, race,
etc). I wish some of them wouldn't automatically assume
that wisdom comes with age. The only thing that's a
guarantee with age is wrinkles. Wisdom is a gift not all
are bestowed. Young or old. Okay, I'll get off my soap box
now...

So back to the gym; The sauna is supposed to be relaxing,
but today there were two older people in there that would
not shut up! A lady in her 60's (who is known to be a
bitch to anyone and everyone for no apparent reason) and a
man in his 70's (whom I've only spoken to once before, but
I'm pretty sure I don't like him). They kept going on and
on about how much they hate Obama and hope he fails (he's
nothing but a swindling used car salesmen was one lovely
sentiment). Then I had to hear about their physical
ailments and how their medicare has been cut and how their
retirement is being affected by irresponsible young people
who all want to live in big houses and drive Cadillacs,
but don't put in the work to get those things and then end
up mooching off the government when they lose everything.


First of all, regardless of whether or not you like the
president, it's pretty shitty to wish them to fail.
Failure would be catastrophic for our country. How wise is
that? To wish him to be unsuccessful simply because he's
not from your political party or doesn't necessarily share
your views? I voted for Obama, but had McCain won, I
wouldn't have wanted him to fail. I would have wanted him
to succeed in the best possible ways. I would have wanted
him to make things better any way he could, even if it
didn't necessarily align with my own personal views.
Where's the wisdom in hate?

Then there was the comment about young people wanting a
big house and a Cadillac. While that may be true for some
young folks (and they do go out there and overextend
themselves sometimes), that's so far from the truth for
most. Especially among the environmentally conscious young
people I know. I have no desire for a big house. I live in
a 1,900 square foot house and every day I clean it I wish
it was smaller. I'd gladly go back to a 700 square foot
apartment if the floor plan worked. I don't need nor want
a Cadillac. I like my modest vehicles. I don't have huge
amounts of debt, I don't take anything from the
government. I resent being chunked into the "young people"
category that's siphoning away their retirement (however
they think young people are doing that). Maybe they should
remember that the social security they're collecting this
month is being paid out of me and my husband's (and every
other working individual's) paychecks. I absolutely hate
politics.

I want to (NEED to) talk to Snookums so bad. The ship's
communications are still down and every time I try to send
him an email, it just gets sent back. I haven't heard from
him since Sunday and it's driving me crazy! I miss him :(
In 11 days we'll be at the half-way point of this
deployment. I'm really proud of myself. I'm holding it
together and handling my business. Some days better than
others, but I'm doing okay. No catastrophic mistakes or
life-altering bad decisions. If I've made it this far, I'm
confident I'll be fine for the other half of the 6 months.
Piece of cake :)

I'm ready for bed. I've got a cup of tea steeping and my
book waiting. I need to decompress... Ciao.




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