Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2009-01-24 08:02:08 (UTC)

Yappy Ass Little Dogs

I've come to the realization that I'm just not cut out for
military housing. I guess I'm not cut out for apartment
living, either because I don't like living in such close
proximity to other people; i.e sharing a wall. My
neighbors started playing music around 8:30pm and it's now
almost midnight and it's just as loud as it was when they
first turned it on. It also sounds like they're banging
furniture into the walls or something. I live it a town
house. I'm the end unit connected to another house and I
can hear everything from their dishwasher and garbage
disposal to their loud music and yappy ass little dogs. I
hate it. I'm not going over there. I'll deal with it, but
I wish they'd stop. Maybe I'm so bothered by it because
I'm already in a sour mood, but it's my prerogative to be
in a sour mood and there is an unenforced quiet
time/curfew in housing. That shit should have been turned
off at 10pm.

I need to eat something. I don't really feel like it
though. I'm not even hungry. I had a peanut butter and
jelly sandwich with Kiki earlier this afternoon. She
wanted to have a "picnic" on the living room floor. PB&J's
cut into little triangles, with pink lemonade (which
doesn't really go well together, but that's what she
wanted). That's all I've had today. I've got those
butterflies in my stomach. I suppose it's anxiety, but I
don't know what about. I don't have anything to be anxious
about. It happens a lot when Snookums is gone. When I'm
anxious I can't eat (which is a new development for me. I
used to be an emotional eater). It explains why I lose so
much weight when he's gone. In less than two weeks I've
dropped 7 pounds. I'm so not trying (at least not yet).

I'm thinking of joining a civilian gym (because the
military gym refuses to include child care for us
spouses). They've got the family friendly fitness center,
which is nice of them to give us SOMETHING, but it's
hardly adequate. There's no weight machines and not that
many aerobic machines either. It's kind of sad, but the
kids aren't allowed in the "real" gym. So, I'm in the
market for a better alternative. Once I find somewhere I
like then I'll start getting serious about getting back
into shape. I'll never be the shape I was pre-babies
(considering I was 16 pre-babies), but I can at least be
in shape. I'm less focused on perfection and more focused
on being healthy and comfortable in my own skin.

I feel a little guilty :( One of my goals before we
transfer is to get the Impala paid off. We've got 9 months
until it's paid in full, but I want title in hand by
moving day (some time in October). So, since Snookums is
gone and we're not eating out or doing a lot of shopping,
I sent about 1/3 of Snookums' paycheck to the bank. Then
he sent me an email saying he wanted money to go on a
wildlife tour in Japan. I felt bad, because we had the
extra money for it before I sent that principal payment. I
still want him to be able to do it (that's one of the
perks of being in the military - seeing the world), but
it'll require me to dip into the money I set aside for
daily living. I hate not having a little nest egg set
aside for the unknown and our savings is virtually
untouchable (I made it that way for a reason). I hate
money. I'm grateful that I'm dealing with allocating money
and not suffering from not having money. I'm very
fortunate in that regard, but I still hate it. Money
really is the root of all evil...

The music stopped :) Ahhhhhh, silence. Nevermind, it's
back again. I'm going to take a shower and if it's still
on when I get out, I'm going over there. Ciao.




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