Nic.

The View Of The Oddball
2009-01-20 23:13:03 (UTC)

IM SUICIDAL!

Im SUICIDAL!

There you go im officially postive I am! Ive dreampt and
planned how I would kill myself! Bad right! You may think
Im crazy but Im not..Its just how I feel I sit and dream
the day I would kill myself and see how people would feel.
I dream of jumping of this like bridge thing in my town!
Its not over water its over concrete! But I want to do it!
I want to jump and just die!..Im tired of my life!...It
means nothing to me anymore..! If you think Im sick and I
need to talk to a mental counsler dont even suggest it
plz!..Ive been through about 11 to 12 years of therapy and
Im never! going back to that!

Im BIPOLAR!

Im Bipolar and I have realized it! But I wont tell my mom
about it.. She noes my attitude is out of control. But
shes not sure why and I wasnt till one day when I was
reading about bipolar disorder!..And I realized thats me!
Everything that says is me!..I have only told one person
that I believe I am Bipolar..He is also the only one I
told that Im suicidal!..And that Im thinking of cutting
again!..No matter what I do I cant escape!...I want to
kill myself!

Im A CUTTER!

I started cutting when I was about 11 or 12! I have been
on and off of it for these past few years..But Even if I
dont do it thats still who I am..I will still be known as
a cutter!..Because I still have an amazing urge to do
it!..But one person is holding me back from that
road!..Hes the one keeping me from killing myself and
cutting myself..Hes the one trying to convince me to tell
my mom!..And I love him to death because hes always there
for me!..Anyway..I think Im going to start cutting
again!..But I may not tell him or I may..Im not sure right
this second!..

I Have DEPRESSION!

Yes This is a fact. I am suffering from depression.Tho if
you looked at me you probably couldnt tell because I hide
it very well..I mean sometimes I have my moments that Im
in class and I start crying..But then there are the times
that Im extremly depressed and I still laugh like
crazy!..Its only because I dont want everyone to
constantly asking me whats wrong!..I cant handle that!..I
have to sit through a horrible day of skool..And act like
Im fine!

And Lastly Im Just ME!

Im the person I feel like being. I dont want to live up to
anyones expectations..Thats to much stress.My life is
crazy enough without people telling me how to live it!..
I will forever be the person I feel like..The person I
know I am..Or have become? I dont know..All I know is
that.This is my life and Im going to control it!

SEND FEEDBACK!

--Feelings Can Kill =/




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