Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2008-12-24 20:32:44 (UTC)

Our Rational Kind Of Love

Somehow my computer has managed to become ravaged by
Trojan viruses. I'm not sure how it happened and I don't
really care that much. Yeah, my computer is an important
part of my daily life, but I'm not going to wither and die
without it. At the moment it's working somewhat. I can get
online sometimes and that's enough. Really, this computer
has had a good run. It's almost 4 years old and hasn't had
any real problems. I'm getting ready for a new one,
though. My keyboard is so worn you can't see the letters
anymore :) The ridges on the fulcrum keys are almost worn
away. Every entry in my diary has been written on this
keyboard. Maybe I'll keep it for posterity. In a closet
somewhere. That's kind of out of character for me, though.
I don't like holding onto unnecessary items. If you're
feeling at all uneasy or stressed out, try eliminating
clutter from your life. Trust me, it works.

Yesterday was our Anniversary. Snookums and I have been
married for 5 years. Together for almost 6 years. I'm
still having trouble fathoming that. I look back over the
years and think about what we've lived through and it's
astounding to me. It doesn't seem like it's been that long
and then on the other hand it hasn't been that long at all
and we've got so many more years ahead of us (knock on
wood). Really, the time has just flown by. I suppose
that's a good thing. If the past 5 years had felt like
drudgery that probably wouldn't bode well for the rest of
our marriage. I have a special kind of love for Snookums.
I'm beyond infatuation, beyond the "honeymoon" stage. Our
love has matured. It's rational and amicable. Which may
sound boring and kind of sad, but really it's just a sign
of stability. Our love is solid and it will stand the test
of time. We have moments where we make each other weak in
the knees (and that keeps things interesting), but for the
most part we know each other and we're comfortable with
who we are and what we have together. I'm happy with the
way things are. Since I'm really into being honest with
myself these days, I can say that without reservation. I'm
glad I'm not infatuated with Snookums. Infatuations end. I
love our rational kind of love :) We've built a life
together that's about as perfect as anything as imperfect
as life can be. I wish everyone could be as fulfilled as I
am. Maybe there would be less war and poverty in the
world. I don't know. Stop me before I start getting
idealistic!!!

Snookums' dad (Dan) is flying in today. We've never had
family here for the holidays. They usually come before or
after. It's especially rare to have Dan coming. He is a
consummate workaholic and rarely takes time off. So, it's
a pretty big deal. Our lives haven't really been touched
by the current economic environment, but Dan and Helena
have felt the squeeze. They're million dollar mansion
isn't worth as much (and they'd wanted to sell it),
they're investments have suffered and living the life
they're accustomed to has become more expensive. Dan is 60
years old and kind of ready to retire (physically, but not
mentally ready) but at this point in time they'd only be
able to maintain they're accustomed way of life for 10
years before their retirement runs out and they'd only
have Social Security. That must be frightening for them.
But I can't help but wonder if maybe lowering their
standard of living wouldn't be a good idea. Two people
don't need a 5 bedroom house, 4 cars, a boat, 2 vacation
homes and a stock portfolio the size of an Encyclopedia
Britannica. Whatever. It's not my life to live. I'm glad
he's coming. He's a nice man, Snookums loves and admires
him and he hasn't met Keenan yet. I'm looking forward to
seeing him.

On the subject of Keenan, I haven't mentioned much about
him lately. He's changed so much. Keenan is 6 and a half
months old and my biggest baby yet! When Snookums got home
we started feeding him a little rice cereal, which he
didn't take to right away, but a few weeks ago he started
liking it and that evolved into other foods. He loves all
the vegetables and fruits in stage one and has started
trying some of the stage two foods. Snookums wants to give
him meat, but we're still in contention about that. I
don't think he's old enough, but Jason being the carnivore
that he is, thinks it's only natural. I'm going to win
this battle. No meat. My little porker has got to be at
least over 22 pounds, but that's just a guesstimate. He's
outgrown his 6-9 month clothes which go up to 20 pounds.
All I know is he's a big boy. He's alert and happy. He's
full of smiles and I love him in a way I didn't think was
possible. I love my girls, but the bond Keenan and I have
is incredible. Nursing is different now. He isn't as into
it as he was when he was exclusively breastfed. He's
eating more food and drinking less milk and I kind of feel
full all the time, which makes me sad. I'm not looking
forward to weaning in 6 months and I'm starting to wonder
if I'll be able to. I don't want to be one of those
mother's nursing a 5 year old, but I'm willing to nurse as
long as Keenan wants to. Partly for my own selfish
reasons. He's my last baby and I don't want to let that
go :(

I have to be going now. My father-in-law will be here soon
and I should probably put on something other than a
Victoria's Secret night gown and lounge pants. I don't see
why I have to change. It's not like I'm not totally
covered from head-to-toe... Ciao and Happy Holidays
everyone!




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