Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2008-10-06 07:19:40 (UTC)

Something Fierce

****

When I woke up this morning my body hurt so bad, I felt
like I'd ran a marathon yesterday. Instead of just doing
some heavy-duty cleaning. For the first time since having
Keenan, my sciatica was acting up something fierce. When I
went to get out of bed my left leg gave out. It wasn't
fun. Never will I let my house get so out of hand again. I
feel silly saying that. It's not like I live in filth.
When others come in they don't see the carnage that I see,
but that's just how I am. I hold myself at much higher
standards than I hold others.

Even being in intense pain wasn't enough to keep me from
cleaning up this morning. I was too tired to do it last
night, I just put the food away and left the dishes and
living room as they were, but I took care of it this
morning. I didn't spend yesterday busting my ass to let a
little 30 minute tidy-up sabotage all my hard work!

I don't want to sound like a mean mommy, but I HATE it
when Annie invites friends over. As I was doing dishes,
Annie came into the house with two of her friends behind
her and asked if they could come inside to play. It was a
crappy day outside (cold and grey) and they were already
there, looking at me. I couldn't say no. So, I didn't. My
back was killing me, my body was sore, I was trying to
clean, Kiki was feeling left out. It sucked hardcore. I
didn't want those kids here, but I did it anyway. Being a
parent involves all kinds of sacrifice you don't have to
think about when you're childless. Sometimes I wonder what
it would be like to be an adult without children. I've
never been one. I had Annie when I was still a child,
myself.

Thankfully, the kids' mother came for them after a couple
hours and I was able to go lay down. I just needed to find
a comfortable position to take the pressure off my back.
It wasn't long before I had everybody in bed with me. All
three children and both cats. It was nice (very cozy) and
I was actually grateful they were there. I knew they
weren't messing up the house if they were with me :) We
watched documentaries on National Geographic until it was
time for dinner.

I'm feeling better now. My back doesn't hurt as much
(although I'm still sore). I'm tired. Very tired, even
after resting for most of the day. I'm going right back to
bed. Ciao.




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