Maelstrom143, By Sun or Candlelight
- September 2007
- 03 - Loneliness
- 04 - Loneliness...revisited
- 04 - Mneme Uncovered
- January 2008
- 02 - To Be Me
- 02 - Songs, poems, and all ...
- 02 - Strawberry Wine - by ...
- 02 - One of Us - Joan Osborne
- 02 - Ai wa kanyo de ari, ai ...
- 02 - Long-lost vice...
- 04 - Sometimes Love Just ...
- 06 - Sundown again
- 12 - Between a rock and a ...
- February 2008
- 16 - Two codes, one save.
- 20 - Maddia
- 20 - Viejito Lindo
- 20 - Un Pasado Tan Vacio
- 20 - Camptown Races and all ...
- 20 - "Viejo, Mi Querido ...
- 20 - Shadows' Man
- March 2008
- 25 - I'm Pinging again
- September 2008
- 01 - Too many brands in the ...
- February 2009
- 04 - Don't Nag.
- April 2010
- 04 - Burning
- May 2010
- 05 - The Good Mother - A ...
- June 2010
- 06 - When is it too soon to ...
- August 2010
- 19 - My Lover, My Husband
- 19 - Forever the Ocean
- September 2010
- 01 - Spilled Perfume, By Pam ...
- 10 - Soliloquy
- October 2010
- 05 - I want to whine a bit
- November 2010
- 07 - Random thought processes
- January 2011
- 25 - Funny the things that ...
- May 2011
- 06 - Last Night
- 06 - Longing
- 06 - Close Your Eyes
- 06 - Waiting for the Morrow
- 06 - About me...
- 06 - We Are...
- June 2011
- 08 - Really pissed right now
- July 2011
- 05 - What if...?
- December 2011
- 30 - My Sister
- January 2012
- 03 - Dear Sister
- 29 - Hi Sis
- 30 - Chacho
- February 2012
- 13 - Sand Castles
- 13 - Haunted
- 29 - Some Days Are Better ...
- March 2012
- 31 - Little Butterfly, by ...
- April 2015
- 24 - Compunction
- May 2015
- 02 - The Heat of Me ...
- 18 - I Remember
- August 2015
- 26 - Walk Away
- March 2016
- 11 - Sonnets from the ...
- September 2017
- 04 - Pondering old memories ...
2008-09-01 22:33:54 (UTC)
Too many brands in the fireHaven't posted in a while. I started going back to the
gym. I miss lifting and body building in general; miss my
buddies and workout sessions...funny how I was never
romantically attracted to those I worked out with and hung
out with. Thank goodness. Keeps things simple.
Life here has been rough. Family member getting worse. She
is now under Hospice care in her home. I am/was her
primary caregiver, but due to differences with her
daughter, I begged off...will meet with her later this
week to iron out a schedule that will allow me to return
to work and to care for my sons appropriately. I do not
mind the care, I love our family member dearly and enjoy
the time we spend together, but the bullshit and red tape
and family crap...I just never had the patience for it. I
would rather just up and leave. No one matters enough for
me to put up with human crap, or so I thought. Anyway,
life has been a maelstrom of activity and fatigue and
anger and guilt. My poor sons are forever playing second
fiddle to work and family and they are so wonderful and
patient. I really love those little guys. I am not sure
what life would be like without them. They truly love and
give of themselves even when I am a total piece of work,
you know? I hope whoever they end up loving appreciates
how wonderful they are...I hope when they grow up they
remain as wonderful as they are now, in spite of life's
I had a heartbreaking week, but I do not want to talk
about it right now. It still hurts some and I think it
will for a long time, so I will wait until I can think
unemotionally about it.