rainy

My heart in a knot
2008-08-09 00:13:04 (UTC)

Player..player...

So here's the deal with sean... he hasn't fired me yet..
although I feel that my time is short.. and I don't like it
because it's hard to get a job.. a decent one anyway...


But that's not what I'm here to talk about, I'm here to talk
about sean.. he just likes women... I mean he likes them a
lot and I guess that's natural but I don't know the secret
lives of guys or anything like that...

Well today at work let's just say I came across some images
that really gave me a inside view on how large his world is
when it comes to girls... you see I like him but it would be
almost impossible for him to like me for any length of
time.. especially considering that I don't stand out from
all the other girls plus I haven't really done anything to
catch his attention or interest..

Oh yea.. and when I say he likes girls..I really mean that,
it looks like he has had many different relationships with
girls.. and it looks like a lot of them have gone bad.. and
here I am chasing after him like a little puppy but yet I
don't have special tricks to show him, I need to be able to
stand out from the rest of them to catch his attention..

so that is what I'm going to be working on in the next few
weeks... I have to get his attention some how... He did give
me a quarter today so maybe that's a good sign... lol...
just kidding..

But really I need to work on my looks first.. it was my
looks that first attracted him... but when you think about
it that may have been the problem in the first place. He
never wanted anything more then a fling... but I guess
that's a bit natural.. the problem is that I want more..

Anyway... I am going to find a way back into his life..
Tonight I wanted to talk to him but some girl was there
annoying the crap out of me...I hate seeing them together..
anyway they were talking and sharing stories today... it
annoyed the shit out of me.. then to make matters worst they
stayed alone with each other doing god knows what. I was
just imagining all the cookie points she was getting. Thouse
points belong to me... and well.... I lost my train of
thought.....

so yea... sean likes girls... and has commitment issues..
and it looks like he has broken lots of girls hearts before..

I don't know where I stand in all of this but I'm having a
whole latta fun doing this... I just hope I don't come off
as the crazy psycho girl trying to have him because it's not
like that... he's just so cute .. and blah blah blah..

I need to write more interesting entry's...

I'll work on it..

ttyl




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