Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2008-07-10 02:37:06 (UTC)

Banana Bread and Baby Clothes

****

Distraction is a state of being I've been spending a lot
of time in lately. It might be a little sleep deprivation,
the new baby, dealing with surging hormones. I don't know,
but distraction caused me some pain today. I was making
lunch for Kiki and Snookums. Fish sticks and french fries.
As I reached into the oven to turn everything over, the
top of my hand touched the edge of the rack and left a
pretty ugly inch long welt. It's not as painful as it
looks, but I'm sure it'll leave a mark. I don't know where
my head was. When I felt the burn, I came back down to
earth and was almost surprised to find myself in the oven.
I kind of forgot what I was holding the spatula for. It
was weird. But, then again I'm weird, so I shouldn't be
surprised.

Sue sent Jason a package today. Banana bread and baby
clothes. I used to love her banana bread, but over the
course of the past five years it's gotten drier and drier.
I'm always holding out hope she added an extra banana to
this batch, but it's never the case. The baby clothes were
cute. She sent a couple of different sizes. Some things
Keenan can were now and a few things for when he gets
bigger. Layettes and onesies. It was very thoughtful of
her, especially since she doesn't have much money (we make
more than double per annum what she makes, so we don't
expect her to go all out), even though she's got a college
degree and works for a college (Eastern Washington
University). I think someone needs to negotiate a raise.
This ain't 1976 anymore, but her salary isn't my problem.
How'd I get on that topic, anyway?

I got my July issue of American Baby today and it's a good
one! I swear it was like every article related to my
family! Kiki's potty training issues, recovering from
delivery, re-kindling the romance after baby (not ready
for that yet, but when the time comes...), dealing with a
colicky baby (yeah, we've accepted that Keenan has colic.
We handle it well, but he fits all the criteria Dr. Ennis
told me to look for. Oh well). I read it pretty much from
cover-to-cover. I didn't learn anything I didn't already
know, but it's always good to have confirmation that
you're doing all you can do. Or to see if there's
something new worth trying.

I had an irrational breakdown this afternoon. It wasn't
really irrational, but I felt stupid trying to explain to
Snookums what was wrong. I'd just finished reading the
article on colic and I thought to myself "man, I'll be so
glad when this is over". By "this" I meant the whole
colicky newborn phase. As I thought this thought, it
occurred to me that most babies that have colic don't get
over it until they're 3 or 4 months old. I don't want to
wish away a quarter of Keenan's babyhood. Children are
babies for such a short period of time. Yeah, it may be a
little tough right now, but it will all be a memory soon
enough. Anyhow, this internal dialogue somehow elicited a
major bout of "ugly crying" that scared the life out of
Snookums. One minute I was fine, the next I'm sobbing
uncontrollably into a receiving blanket. This must be
confusing times for him. Snookums did his best to make me
feel better. We took a shower (during Keenan's quiet time)
and he took care of the girls for me this evening (baths
and dinner). I feel better now. I'm not even particularly
sad or stressed out. Just a little hormonally emotional. I
think that's to be expected, given the circumstances.

I need to find myself something to eat. Snookums fed
himself and the girls leftovers (the fridge was
overflowing), but I hate leftovers and I don't want
anything in particular. If they made a pill that made
hunger go away, I'd so take it. Ciao.




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