Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2008-06-26 05:35:20 (UTC)

Between A Dream and Reality

*****

Yet another great day. I simply can't complain. Keenan
slept really well last night. A block of three hours, a 20
minute feeding, then a block of four hours. Just as I
suspected I would, I'm getting more sleep now then I was
when I was pregnant. I'm still a little tired, but I have
busy days juggling three kids. I feel good. Even if a
little sleepy at times.

Now that I'm not pregnant anymore I feel the need to fill
my days with something. I'm still happy being at home.
Pitter-pattering around my house, doing little chores and
making sure my home is nice and clean. But, I still like
getting out for a little while. Today, I had coffee with
Gen for the first time since Keenan arrived. It wasn't
much different from the way it was before. He slept the
entire time. I was able to cross my legs when I sat down,
which is something you take for granted, until you can't
do it.

Gen pointed out during our coffee date that I seemed like
I was far away for a minute. Now that I think about it,
she's right. I feel like I'm in a dream. I'm existing
somewhere between a dream and reality. I don't know if
it's hormonal or what. I feel very light and happy, but
other than Keenan vacating my body, nothing has really
changed. I think I planned and prepared for his birth for
so long, put so much effort and energy into it, that I'm
just so glad he's finally here. He's ten days old and I
can't even remember what life was like before him.

I stopped in at work again today. This time most of the
old-timers where working because Rebecca (our district
manager) was there. I didn't know that, but it was great
timing on my part. I wasn't going to stop by originally,
but Annie was at the park with a friend's family and I
figured it wouldn't be too often that I'd only have two
kids with me instead of three. So, I went. Everybody
gushed over him and passed him around. He slept through
the whole thing. He's such an easy baby.

Since I was in the mall, I did walk a lap around the
place. Aeropostale was having a sale, so I stopped in and
bought a couple t-shirts and a breastfeeding reminder
bracelet. I'm always forgetting which side Keenan fed on
last, so now I've got a pretty blue and teal beaded
bracelet to remind me which side is next. I was using a
hair tie, but it was cutting off my circulation. Not a
good thing.

I found out today that Annie is a little grossed out by
breastfeeding. She didn't tell me that, I overhear her say
something to a friend. She brought home a little boy named
Dominic (well, he wasn't that little. He was her age, but
almost as tall as me). I was holding Keenan, getting a
glass of water (because nursing makes me thirsty). Keenan
was getting a little agitated because he was hungry. His
arms and legs were moving around and he had his eyes open.
Dominic asked how old Keenan was and why he was upset. I
simply told him "because he's hungry". Annie and Dominic
proceeded to leave at that point and Annie turned to
Dominic and said (with her grossed out face on) "you don't
want to know how she feeds him". I have to admit, it kind
of hurt my feelings. Both Annie and Kiki understand what
breastfeeding is and I'd like to hope that they'd do the
same for their children. Sometimes Annie says hurtful
things without realizing it. She is, after all, just a
child. There's still hope for her :)

I have to go. Keenan is doing his cluster feeding again
and I don't really like nursing on the computer. It's hard
to reach the keyboard over the Boppy. Ciao.




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