Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2008-06-18 06:56:59 (UTC)

So Much Promise

*****

I've managed to find a moment to write. Not too long of a
moment, but it should be long enough. I underestimated the
demands being the mother to three would entail, but it's
so worth it. It's not that it's that much harder. It's
just logistically challenging. Like, trying to nurse and
make dinner at the same time. I'll get the hang of it,
just give me a week!

I can't even begin to describe how happy I am right now.
Just two days ago I was at the end of my rope. I didn't
think I could go on for one more day the way things were.
Still being pregnant was taking a huge toll on me (but you
knew that pretty well already). I was very frustrated,
confused, angry, depressed. It was a myriad of emotions.
Fueled by pregnancy hormones, of course, but that doesn't
make the feelings any less real. Today I woke up feeling
totally different! Like there was so much promise ahead of
me. There is so much promise ahead of me. I must always
hold onto that though, because even when it doesn't feel
like it, there is always hope and happiness. My life is
full of it, if I'd only take the time to see it.

My physical body is a little sore at the moment.
Recovering from the delivery is going well, but is of
course, slow-going. It takes 9 months to make a baby and
just as many months to recover, but that first one sure is
a bitch. Not to mention my milk is coming in, but Keenan
is a lazy baby and doesn't want to wake up to eat. When he
does want to eat, he's very good at it. His latch is
strong and he stays on for a good 15-20 minutes at a time.
I'm so glad he's taking to nursing well. I didn't get the
chance to really nurse Annie and Kiki was never able to
figure it out. Keenan is a pro! I'm seriously considering
pumping just to relieve the pressure, though. He's a great
eater when I can get him to wake up, but all he wants to
do is sleep. Tonight I'll try to get him to eat every 2
hours instead of every 3-4 hours. Maybe that'll help. I'll
consider pumping tomorrow if this plan doesn't work.

The few people that happen to read my diary are probably
chomping at the bit to hear my birth story :) Or not. I
don't know. Well, I just so happened to have taken very
detailed notes in the form of a time line. My delivery was
so wonderful. I really can't complain, so I'll be glad to
share it, but that's a whole 'nother entry...




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