Interrupted
My Life Thus Far
A More Normal Order
****
Physically, I can barely walk I'm so exhausted, but
mentally I feel great! Getting back into a more normal
order has done wonders for my mood. I'm still a little
bitchy (sorry Gen, you know what I'm talking about), but
it's slightly better and can only improve from here. I'd
forgotten how good it feels to be master of my own
domain :)
After writing late this morning, Kiki and I went out to
run a few errands. I made an effort to avoid places I
normally go (i.e Starbucks), because I knew everyone and
their mama would ask me about the baby. Still a sore
subject, even though I have some tidbit of information to
give them. My uterus is still my business.
On a related topic with my uterus, I'm a little bummed out
about my e-mail notifications. I used to get weekly
pregnancy updates from babygaga.com, babycenter.com,
pampers.com and thedailykick.com. I was so disappointed
today when I got "your 1 week old" updates instead of "41
weeks" updates. What gives? I'm by far not the only woman
on the planet to go past 40 weeks. They should go up to 42
weeks and if you have your baby before then, you can go
change your updates to baby ones. Instead, I felt a little
left out because I'm being schooled on how to clean an
umbilical stump when I don't have a stump to clean yet!
Not that I'd need help with that, anyway. I've cleaned a
few stumps in my lifetime.
I've decided I love Staples. I have a love for office
supplies apparently, because even though I really only
went in for a color ink cartridge and photo paper, I was
terribly tempted to buy a bunch more stuff. I stopped at a
8 pack of pens. I allowed myself that luxury because Kiki
has once again lost all the pens I keep on my desk, little
stinker. I would have gotten my baby announcements there,
too, but all they had were religious ones. I don't do
crosses, angels and praying hands. Now, if they'd had
Buddha baby announcements, I would have been all over
those!
Since I still needed announcements I made the mistake of
going to Target. What can I say, I love Target. Right as I
walked into the store I ran into Barbara. Barbara works
stock at VS and of course wanted to know what was up with
the baby. I was polite and gave her the limited info I
have, but running into her made me glad I hadn't gone to
Starbucks. I would have had to repeat the whole spiel at
least a couple more times and that would have pissed me
off.
I encountered the same problem with Target's selection of
announcements. All of the boy-themed announcements were
sold out. They had one unisex baby-themed announcement
(which I felt had too much pink in it) and then a bunch of
religious ones. Crosses and angels. Why? There are some of
us in the world that believe our bodies created our
babies, not a mystical being no one has ever seen. Call me
a heathen if you'd like. That's just the way I feel. I
ended up settling on a masculine dark brown and beige
French toile (yes, toile can be masculine) stationary with
a little birdy on it. I think it'll look nice once I print
the actual announcement on it. I got matching envelopes,
too. I'll stick a couple of Keenan's first pictures in
with it and call it good.
Of course, being that I was in Target, I had to buy other
things, too. I bought more diapers and wipes, my personal
care items, a Slurpee. I've done far more damage. I'm
actually proud of myself for that. But, I need to stop or
I'll have diapers coming out of my ears. Keenan will be in
a size 2 before I need to buy diapers for him again. I'm
not stockpiling diapers for Kiki, because I'm hoping
she'll miraculously potty-train herself any minute now :)
I also bought a box of 504 wipes. I should be set for
awhile in that department, too.
I bought stuff I like to have at the Commissary. Helena
left me stocked up on about a half dozen boxes of crackers
and crap I never buy (or use for that matter), but I
bought the stuff the girls and I usually eat. I feel more
prepared now for when Gen is here and when I come home
from the hospital. At least for a little while.
I got an interesting friend request on myspace today.
Nicole. Ron's girlfriend. At first, I was wondering why
she was trawling for information or if maybe she had an
ulterior motive for wanting to be my friend, but I called
Ron and we talked about it for awhile. It turns out she
just wants to give me a chance. Not that I've done
anything wrong, but I used to be a threat to her. I think
I'm less so now. Ron and I weren't meant to be together.
We've accepted that and moved beyond it. She and Ron work,
so she's more comfortable with us being friends. That's
good. It shows that we're all growing and evolving. I
don't know if the four of us (Jason, Nicole, Ron and I)
will ever be buddy-buddy, but it's still a good thing that
some animosity is disipating.
I'm in the process of perfecting my home again. I won't
get there tonight, but I'm making a valiant attempt. I'm
washing rugs, cleaning my bathroom, sweeping and mopping.
Just some little things in the event that I don't get to
come home tomorrow. I'm mentally preparing myself for
that, but not getting my hopes up. Dr. Ennis said this
weekend. This weekend is upon me and of course I'm a
little nervous about it, but I'm excited too. I just hope
it's not another false start. Dr. Ennis wanted to induce
me last weekend and that didn't happen. I'm so nervous!
Damn. This entry is long. I hadn't intended for it to be.
I need to get back to my obsessive-compulsive behavior
before I get too tired to finish. Ciao!
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