Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2007-08-05 21:52:18 (UTC)

My Wounded Child

Years ago the child in me was wounded by the world,
well meaning as it was.

The scars of yesterday remain etched on my being,
taking their toll on all my days and nights.
Looking back I can see the errors of those around me.
Little did they know the pain and suffering they would
bring me.
Now that I am older I search for that loving open child
that was.
But she remains in hiding from the pain that today might
bring.
I want to set her free, so that my life can be anew. But
to reach her
I must look deep into the pain and the past. She protects
herself with games that she plays. Games of guilt and
anger and fear and resentment.
There is no winner in these games. For me to be free she
must be free to act and react not as the world expects but
as she feels is right.
Those around may not understand the turmoil and grief I
feel for her suffering. I'm not even sure who she is
anymore but I know when she comes forth that I will over
her.
For she is the me I used to be and want to be again.

The me that is real.

I have missed her all these years and it is time for her
to have
her say. To guide my feeling and my growth. It is time for
her to set my world right. She has been gone too long.
I welcome her now to brighten my future and change my
ways.
To help me laugh and love again in ways only she knows
how. For when she returns, you may not know me. But that's
okay, for she will love you just the same. She will bring
a smile to your face and love to your heart.




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