Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2007-08-02 08:15:00 (UTC)

A Pleasant Diversion

***

Healing is peeling away the barriers of fear that keep us
unaware of our true nature of love, peace, and rich
interconnection with the web of life. Healing is the
rediscovery of who we are and who we have always been.

I have felt out of sorts all day. From the moment I woke
up this morning until now. When I got up this morning, I
felt low. Which was really discouraging after so many days
of feeling good. It doesn't feel like it's going to last
long. The cloud hasn't settled down over me, but there was
no reason for feeling down today.

I woke up at 7am when my alarm went off, but instead of
getting up and going to the gym like I'd intended to do. I
just rolled over and went back to sleep. I woke up again
at 9am when Kiki crawled into bed with me, but even that
didn't get me up out of bed. She snuggled down next to me.
I switched on the tv for her and went right back to sleep.
I didn't get up until 11am, when it was absolutely
necessary for me to get up. I had to be to work at noon.
So, I hurriedly got myself and the girls dressed and
rushed out. That didn't help my disposition much. I hate
rushing.

I got to work late. Only by about 5 minutes, but I hate
being late, so that pissed me off a little. There's more
traffic in the afternoon than in the morning. I hadn't
anticipated that. I'm used to working mornings now. Not
afternoons. At least, going in during the afternoon.

Work dragged by. I know it was because I wasn't in a good
mood. It didn't help I was back in the fitting room on a
slow day. It seems that on slow days, customers never make
it all the way to the back of the store. Only the people
that already know what they want or the ones who just need
to try on clothes they've picked out. No one that needs my
expertise in picking out the right bra. I felt unneeded
today :(

After I picked up the girls, I took them to McDonald's for
dinner. I always feel like an irresponsible mother for
doing that. I know it isn't good for them, but it's so
easy. No cooking, no dishes. Just crumple up the bag and
toss it in the trash. Easy.

Once they were in bed, I spent my free time turning myself
and my family into Simpson's characters (there's an album
on my myspace. The link is down below, if you didn't
already know). This was such a waste of time. I know I
could have found something else to do, but it was a
pleasant diversion. The house is clean and although I
should have gone to bed early, making Simpson's characters
was fun at the time.

Tomorrow night dad flies in. This time tomorrow he will be
here with me. I'm excited about seeing him. I know his
time here is going to fly by (which isn't a good thing),
but it means that Snookums isn't too far behind. I'm a
little nervous about Snookums coming home. It's been so
long and I think I've changed as a person. I hope he still
likes me for who I am. Even if who I am isn't the same
girl he left behind.

Okay, I'm off to bed now. I have a long day tomorrow. An
opening shift, then a late night trip to the airport. I
need to get some kind of sleep while I can. It's already
looking like I'm only getting 5 hours at best. Ciao until
tomorrow.




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