Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2007-04-10 02:01:50 (UTC)

Yesterday and Today (Denial Is Powerful)

****

Sleeping has become a much higher priority for me. It's
about time, and all it took was an unexpected pregnancy to
make me see the err of my ways. Sleep is important! So,
after falling asleep on the couch last night and waking up
around 11pm, I didn't feel it was totally necessary for me
to write at that moment. So this entry is about yesterday
and today.

Yesterday was Easter (Happy Easter to those who celebrate
it. I don't, but I was forced into it anyway). Bev called
first thing in the morning (7am) and invited us over to
celebrate. Annie and Maija are good friends and have been
since Maija was born, so I agreed. It was nice seeing her.
I always dread going to her little gettogethers, but in
the end I get over it and have a halfway decent time. Of
course she noticed my newly formed pot belly and wondered
what was up with me. 3 months ago my tummy was flat, then
I walk in with a little Buddha belly. So, I let her in on
the secret. I guess it's better than her thinking I'd just
gotten chubby for the hell of it.

After we got home, I just chilled on the couch. I was a
little unhappy to discover that a pair of my favorite PINK
lounge pants now put too much pressure on my lower
abdomen. I had to unbutton them and turn down the waist,
but then they'd fall down every time I stood up, so I just
gave in and put on sweats. It was a very depressing moment
for me. How did this happen so fast? Why didn't I know
sooner that I was pregnant? Was I really in THAT much
denial that all the signals were starring me right in the
face, yet I didn't see them? Wow. Denial is powerful.

Today was a pretty good day. Actually, pretty darn good.
Gen and I got to do coffee, so already I was feeling
happy. She worked a lot last week (with it being Spring
Break) so, we missed a lot of Starbucks time. Work was
good, but a little weird. Everyone kept giving me these
stupid cheesy grins like they new my secret or something.
Like it's so much of a secret now. Everyone and their mama
knows in that place. Gossip travels like a fart on the
wind in that place. Before you know it, everyone's gotten
a whiff of it. So, everything I said was directly
correlated to the fact that I'm with child. If I mentioned
I was going to the bathroom it was followed by "it's
because you're pregnant". Last time I checked all living
creatures need to piss every once in awhile. I don't need
to tell you what I heard after mentioning I was thirsty,
hungry and had a little headache. They all complain
constantly about every little thing wrong with them, right
down to their constipation or smelly feet and it's no big
deal, but I'm the center of attention right now. So, I
must serve my time and hopefully soon someone else's
scandal will overshadow my own.

Gen and I met up after we got off from work, too. We just
walked around the mall a little and checked out the
maternity and shoe departments in Ross. Nothing much. It's
always fun being together. She doesn't irritate me or piss
me off, and I think that's partly why we're such good
friends. We don't piss each other off...at least not
often.

I think I'm going to go rest now. I'm feeling drained, but
not in a horrible way, just mildly fatigued. I've also got
the OG/GYN paperwork to fill out for my appointment
tomorrow. After that, I'm going to have some soup and
crackers for dinner with a little cranberry apple juice
and a big jug of water. I'm still thirsty, which very well
may be a byproduct of the pregnancy, but I don't need to
be reminded of it. Ciao




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