Interrupted

My Life Thus Far
2007-03-29 06:01:47 (UTC)

You Know You're Fat When...

**

Since Snookums has been gone, I've done a complete 360 in
the wrong direction. Instead of losing those last 20
pounds I needed to get to my goal weight, I GAINED 20 and
have set myself back a total of 40 pounds. I hadn't
allowed myself to think about it too much. Even though my
pants all fit tight. My boobs are huge (because of the
extra fat I'm packing on) and I generally just feel more
sluggish, weighed down and tired. I haven't been to the
gym in 3 solid weeks either. Once in awhile I'd have a
glimmer of realization that I was reverting back to my old
ways, but I'd push the thought out of my mind. Today, I
was smacked head on by the knowledge that I'm getting fat
again and now I HAVE to do something about it. I have an
insensitive customer to thank for it too. A completely
unsuspecting stranger who has no idea how she's catapulted
me back to reality with one simple question, one simple
thoughtless question..."When are you due?" Which after my
response of "I'm not pregnant" was followed with an
incredibly thoughtless comment of "You're joking, right?"
I didn't know whether to reach across the counter and
bitch slap her or thank her profusely for helping me reach
my rock bottom in such a quick and painful manner. I chose
the latter, but only because I like my job. So, from this
moment on, my focus is realized and I won't turn back. I
need to get back in shape. Come hell or high water.

You Know You're Fat When...

* Strangers think you're in your second trimester.
* Your pants look and feel like Jimmy Dean sausage
casings.
* You wake up in a bed full of Oreo cookie crumbs and it
doesn't irritate you.
* You fight the children over the last fun-sized Snicker
bar and resort to kung-fu moves to win.
* McDonald's large-sized french fries are considered a
snack.
* Your panties cut off the circulation to your lower
extremities.
* Your socks are too tight.
* Your bras are too tight.
* Everything is too tight!
* Your shirts are now all belly shirts it looks like you
stole from Annie's closet.
* The baby pokes your fat just to watch it ripple.
* You've got a Costco-sized muffin top hanging over the
top of your pants and you secretly check to see if you can
find one bigger than yours.
* You try to convince yourself that "big is beautiful"
even though you know damn well you don't feel that way.
* Seeing yourself naked makes you want to vomit (a whole
new diet plan unto itself).
* And last but not least, the dimples on your butt have
dimples. Sad, but true.

Enough fat me bashing. Feeling sorry for myself isn't
going to change anything, but lucky for me I already know
how to change things. Each new day brings another
opportunity to change the world. Or in this case, my ass.
Ciao.




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